I recently conducted a workshop at the Christian Leadership Training Association Convention in Pasadena, California, on the topic, “Strengthening Your Church’s Immune System.”
The goal of my workshop was to present ten practical ideas designed to prevent most conflicts in Christian churches.
A severe conflict can damage a church, its leaders, and its people for years. The trauma of a major conflict wreaks havoc with personal relationships, church budgets, pastoral careers, and spiritual lives.
So long before a church experiences serious conflict, the pastor and church leaders should discern, model, teach, and implement healthy, biblical behaviors for resolving differences.
And the best way to manage and resolve conflicts in churches is to prevent them before they escalate.
For a church to grow today, a pastor must initiate change … which involves taking risks … which provokes anxiety in some people … which leads to complaining … which usually focuses on the pastor … which can lead to antagonism, plots, secret meetings, accusations, demands, threats, church splits, forced resignations, and ultimately, a decimated congregation.
I believe that pastors must implement these strategies over time to protect their churches form internal attacks – as well as the pastoral position – or a major conflict can wipe out a congregation for years.
HOW CAN YOU STRENGTHEN THE IMMUNE SYSTEM OF YOUR CHURCH?
First, identify and communicate why your church exists and where it is going.
Many of the conflicts I experienced in my first ten years of pastoral ministry were related to our church’s direction … or lack thereof. I had a mental picture of where I wanted those churches to go but I didn’t articulate it clearly and concisely, and consequently, major conflict resulted on two occasions.
Your mission is your church’s overarching purpose, the reason you exist.
Your vision is your church’s preferred future by a certain date; the direction you’re going.
Let me share four thoughts about mission and vision – and I have done what I’m suggesting:
*Utilize a bottom-up approach. Let the people of your congregation have input into the creation of your mission and vision statements. Avoid using a top-down approach where the pastor rams through his ideas without congregational buy-in.
Start by asking your congregation four open-ended questions on a handout, such as:
- What do you like about our church?
- What are our strengths as a congregation?
- Where can we improve?
- What should our church look like in five years?
Reserve 10-15 minutes during a worship service to do this. Let people write whatever they want. Ask them to turn in their surveys anonymously.
Then choose a mission/vision team to compile the responses. Ask the team to meet, maybe on a Saturday morning. Share the responses. Look for patterns. Create draft statements.
Let the pastor refine the language. Send the statements back to the mission/vision team for further input. When the process is complete, the board should officially approve the statements.
*Create compelling statements. Make them shorter rather than longer. The trend today is to have mission statements that are ten words or less so they can be remembered.
“Loving Jesus and others” is boring and vague. “To transform our families and communities for Jesus” is exciting and unifying. Make them simple but somewhat edgy.
*Announce the statements to the church in final form. Post them everywhere: your lobby, website, bulletin, classrooms. The pastor must refer to them often … at least once a month.
*Every consequent decision will flow from your mission/vision statements which may relieve as many as 90% of your church’s “problems.” Those who don’t like the direction – because they wanted to turn your church into Lakewood West or Saddleback North – will be forced to get with the program or leave the church.
Yes, some churches grow without those statements, and some churches that have mission/vision statements never go anywhere. But people want to know, “What’s the plan?” Growth is intentional, not accidental. Without a clear direction, your church will drift.
Second, choose only leaders (pastor/staff/board) who follow and embody Scripture (1 Tim. 3:1-7; Titus 1:5-9).
It’s well-known in evangelical circles that church leaders should be biblically-qualified according to Paul’s lists in the Pastoral Epistles. But selecting leaders of high character doesn’t prevent a church from experiencing a horrific conflict. I know all too well.
*It is crucial that every leader embrace the church’s mission and vision statements. My failure to nail this down was a primary factor in why major conflict surfaced in my last ministry. I assumed that board members were with me without ever asking them directly. Board members can smile when their pastor is present and stab him in the back when he’s absent.
*It is essential that prospective leaders are interviewed (maybe by the pastor and board chairman) and that after they take office, receive training (at least quarterly) and undergo periodic evaluations. (Either every major leader should be evaluated or nobody should be evaluated.)
*The pastor should check with the financial secretary and make sure that any prospective board members are regular, generous givers to the ministry. The pastor can do this by asking the person who knows the givers and their amounts, “Just let me know if this person is a stingy giver … an average giver … or a generous giver.” Believe me, you don’t want any stingy givers on your board because they will tend to shoot down budget increases and special projects because they won’t want to give themselves. You only want regular givers handling church finances.
*It is better to have nobody than the wrong person in leadership. Why? Because it can take a long time to get rid of the wrong person … and there is a price to be paid for doing that.
*It is better to have just a few qualified leaders than any non-qualified leaders. If the church’s governing documents state that you need to have a minimum of seven board members, but you can only find four that are qualified, just go with four. If you don’t, the other three “fill-ins” will kill you.
Third, ask your leaders to study and summarize the biblical principles for conflict resolution.
I believe that the lead pastor in a church must take the initiative to prevent major conflicts from surfacing. One way to do that is to hold regular meetings involving every key leader in your church: staff members, board members, ministry team/committee leaders, small group leaders … and to broaden the ownership base by making the group larger rather than smaller.
The meetings can be held monthly or quarterly … maybe after the last service on Sunday morning, which means you’ll have to provide lunch … but it’s essential that they be held.
This article I wrote several weeks ago describes the process of formulating these principles:
https://blog.restoringkingdombuilders.org/2016/04/21/preventing-a-major-conflict-in-your-church
The aim of such a process is to create a one-page document stating Ten Principles for Resolving Conflict at _________ Church that should be posted in many rooms all over the church. (Just try and envision the rooms where conflict surfaces, like the church office, the associate pastor’s office, the board room, the kitchen … you get the idea.)
Fourth, create a Conflict Resolution Group inside your church of at least three strong, wise, and healthy individuals.
The reason I advocate a CRG is because when a pastor is attacked, there are usually some board members and/or staff members who are involved in trying to oust the pastor.
And when this happens, they almost always use shortcuts to expedite his departure.
They ignore Scripture … the church’s governing documents … labor law … and common decency because they have their eye on one goal: the pastor’s speedy exit … and they are anxious until “the deed is done.”
*The CRG’s job is to make sure biblical principles and processes are followed whenever a conflict surfaces, not to determine an outcome. They make sure that the pastor is treated justly and fairly at all times. They watch over the entire congregation, but engage in special surveillance over the board and staff.
*CRG members should be voted on by the congregation, making them accountable to the whole church. If the board appoints the CRG, it can just disband the group should the board plan to take action to force out the pastor. But if the CRG reports to the congregation, the board and staff may think twice about railroading the pastor unfairly.
*Terms should be for 1-3 years. Consider especially former board members … retired pastors … and people who work in human resources.
*Make provision for them to receive training, such as that offered by Peacemaker Ministries in Colorado Springs. Their website is http://peacemaker.net
Realize that Peacemaker University at its lower levels centers upon how to resolve conflicts between two individuals. I have taken their course on coaching people to resolve conflicts.
*The penalty for violating the CRG’s directives is church discipline and possible expulsion. For example, there might be a statement in the church’s governing documents that if the CRG rules that the board didn’t use the approved process for dealing with the pastor, the board could be suspended or must resign en masse. The CRG cannot function effectively unless they can recommend discipline to the congregation.
Fifth, update your church’s governing documents (constitution/bylaws) every five years.
As churches change, their governing documents should keep pace. While I believe that church constitutions and bylaws should be slaves, not masters, whenever a conflict breaks out, the leaders and congregation must abide by the latest version.
*Insure that your governing documents align with your ten principles for resolving conflict. (Covered under the third step above.)
*Make sure you specify the pathway to remove the pastor from office and to remove troublesome board members and staff members as well.
*If a major conflict ever breaks out, some people will become so reactive that they will resort to “the law of the jungle” to win. If your governing documents are clear, they may think twice.
*If your church is ever sued, and a judge takes the case, the judge will decide for the party that most closely followed the governing documents.
I know this seems like a lot of work, but it can be implemented over time.
In fact, let me go further: if a pastor plans on making changes in his congregation, he should implement as many of these strategies as possible first.
The best time to prepare for war is during a time of peace.
I’ll share the remaining five ways to strengthen your church’s immune system next time.
Restoring Kingdom Builders 
Strengthening Your Church’s Immune System, Part 2
Posted in Church Conflict, Church Health and Conflict, Conflict with Church Antagonists, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with Church Staff, Conflict with the Pastor, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged biblical principles on church conflict, confidentiality and church conflict, pastoral termination, predictable times for church conflict, preventing church conflict on May 11, 2016| 1 Comment »
How much do you like to play chess?
One summer, between eighth and ninth grades, I played 97 games of chess with an older friend. As I recall, I won 49, he won 45, and there were three stalemates.
Since he was in the high school chess club and knew all my tricks, I had to prepare myself for long games, which meant that I had to learn how to set up a defense to protect my key pieces, especially the King and Queen.
In the same way, a church needs to learn how to protect their pastor(s) from attack, and to prepare a long-term defense plan.
In my last article, I mentioned five ways that church leaders can protect their church from the inevitability of internal conflicts. (You can access that article by clicking on the green link above and to the left of the title.)
Let me share the last five ways with you:
HOW CAN YOU STRENGTHEN THE IMMUNE SYSTEM OF YOUR CHURCH?
Sixth, create a special document that specifies how to handle conflicts with the pastor (Matt. 18:15-17; 1 Tim. 5:19-21).
Most churches lack this document. If your church decides to create a Conflict Resolution Group, this could be among their first assignments.
It should be biblically-based, conform to labor law, be consistent with the church’s governing documents, and aim to treat the pastor fairly and justly.
If an individual, a leader, or a group in the church makes accusations against a pastor, the governing board should determine the severity of the charges:
*Forgive citations: these are petty, personal issues people have with the pastor (Prov. 19:11; Matt. 23:23-24). The board should say, “This is such a silly charge that you either need to forgive the pastor, pray for him, or let this go. We won’t pursue this any more.” The great majority of accusations against a pastor fall into this “citation” category.
*Confront misdemeanors: this is where the pastor hurt or offended someone personally or where he committed a minor offense while carrying out his ministry (Luke 17:3-4). The proper way to deal with a minor offense is to speak with the pastor directly about it.
*Investigate felonies: this involves serious charges against the pastor, especially involving heresy, sexual immorality, or criminal behavior (Deut. 19:15-21).
If the pastor is accused of a felony, the board should do an investigation and (a) gather evidence; (b) meet with witnesses; and (c) decide if the charges are legitimate or illegitimate.
If they are illegitimate, the accusers should ask the pastor for forgiveness or leave the church, and the board should insist on this. If the pastor’s accusers don’t admit they’re wrong, they’ll just create more charges down the road.
If they appear to be legitimate, the board should set up a meeting between the accusers and the pastor. The pastor must be allowed to face his accusers.
Once this meeting is held, the board must decide the future of the pastor and his accusers in the congregation. Aim for restoration first (Gal. 6:1), removal last.
Seventh, remind leaders that conflict is likely to break out at certain predictable times:
Much of the time in church life, the pastor and staff know that conflict will surface at specific times. For example:
*When the pastor/leaders are initiating change. This is because church leaders have taken a long time to study the changes but they haven’t allowed enough time for people to share feedback and adjust to the changes themselves.
*Easter/Christmas seasons. This is primarily because everyone wants their church to look good on the major Christian holidays and this causes people to become highly anxious. It’s also because people bring their own personal stress over the holiday to church.
*Budget time. This is because the annual church budget determines a church’s values and priorities (“Oh no, the youth ministry budget got slashed while the pastor’s slush fund was doubled”) and because people become anxious about the church’s ability to reach their targeted income.
*When changing the worship service. Despite the fact that the New Testament never mentions even one Sunday morning worship service … and therefore, churches are free in the Lord to plan their own … some people will react negatively and emotionally to any change that they and their friends do not like.
*The addition of a new generation. How many churches have made specific plans to reach Millennials? What is your church doing to reach them? Just think about the changes you’d have to make … and envision the conflict those changes would provoke.
*The addition or removal of staff. “Why did we hire him? I don’t like the guy.” “Why did they let Pastor Brian go? He was always very nice to me.” Those statements alone speak volumes as to how churchgoers view staff members. While I loved adding new staff, I hated letting anybody go because most of the fallout would be directed at me as pastor.
*When the church is shrinking. This is because people don’t want to invest their time, energy, and money in a sinking ship … and because some will pin the blame for decline on one person: the lead pastor.
*When the church is growing. This may sound surprising, but many pastors are ousted because they were too successful. Many churchgoers … especially long-time leaders … would rather be large fish in a small pond than smaller fish in a larger pond. And when they discover that some of their power is to be shared or taken away by new people, they often rebel.
Eight, practice openness about official church matters while maintaining confidentiality concerning the issues in people’s lives (1 Cor. 1:10-17; 3:1-9; 6:12-19).
During a major conflict, church leaders usually stay tight-lipped and say little or nothing to churchgoers about what’s happening.
But I believe that leaders should share as much as they can, not as little as possible, because as the saying goes, you are as sick as your secrets.
*Your church should have at least one congregational/business meeting annually. The purpose of this meeting is for the church to vote on new board members and next year’s budget.
*Your congregation should also schedule periodic informational meetings (like a town hall meeting) where the pastor and church leaders can provide updates and receive feedback without the pressure of any voting. Two meetings a year sounds reasonable.
*The pastor, staff, and board should be transparent with church members about everything that involves the church as an institution: attendance, weekly giving, the budget, and policies. Membership has its privileges.
*Everyone in the church should know how to contact the key leaders. Their pictures should be on a wall someplace, and their email addresses should be published.
*The church board should report to the congregation in some fashion as often as the lead pastor has to report to the board. You can’t have an accountable pastor and an unaccountable board. It’s a scenario for disaster.
I learned this adage for church leaders from Dr. Archibald Hart: “We don’t have secrets, we do keep confidences.”
Ninth, practice periodic “conflict drills.”
My wife and I run a preschool in our home, and once a month, we have to do a fire drill. (In fact, we just did one within the past hour!) When the alarm sounds, the children must exit through the front door … even if they have one shoe on and one shoe off … and walk to the fire hydrant along the rim of our cul-de-sac as a meeting place.
In the same way, a pastor and a governing board should run one or two “conflict drills” every year … unannounced … so both parties can evaluate how they handle conflict.
Here’s an example:
*A board member hears that several church leaders are openly complaining about the pastor.
*The board member contacts the complainer and says: “If you are upset about policy matters, please speak with anyone who made the policy (usually board members). If you are upset with the pastor personally, please speak with him directly, pray for him, or let it go. Otherwise, we’re not going to entertain your complaints.”
*The board determines the severity of the complaint (citation, misdemeanor, felony) and acts accordingly.
*Consult with the Conflict Resolution Group and make sure that the ten principles and the governing documents are followed.
*The pastor must be allowed to face his accusers.
*The pastor/board contacts (a) a church consultant; (b) a conflict manager; (c) a Christian mediator; (d) a denominational executive for counsel.
*The board makes a decision and announces it to the appropriate parties.
Create your own steps if you’d prefer, but I believe that periodic conflict drills can be a lifesaver for a congregation.
Tenth, implement these five biblical principles for preventing church conflict:
*Talk directly to those you’re upset with rather than telling others about them (Prov. 11:13; 16:28; 18:8; 20:19; 1 Tim. 3:11; 5:13; James 4:11-12; 3 John 9-10).
*Share your frustrations with the appropriate spiritual leader rather than complaining indiscriminately (Num. 14:1-4; Luke 15:1-2; Phil. 2:14; Jude 16).
*Refuse to allow people to drag you into a dispute between two parties (called “triangulation”) (Luke12:13-14; 22:1-6).
*Deal with offenses as they arise rather than collecting them and dumping them on someone (called “gunnysacking”) all at once (Matt. 18:15; 1 Cor. 13:5; Eph. 4:26-27).
*Report those who attack and conspire against church leaders (Rom. 16:17; Titus 3:10-11).
Since implementing any or all of these ten immune system strengtheners is a lot of work, a pastor would be well-served to implement one or two of them every year.
If the pastor doesn’t initiate ideas like these, when a major conflict surfaces – especially if the pastor is attacked – the law of the jungle is likely to take effect.
Depending upon the level of emotion involved, people may choose sides … define enemies … ignore Scripture … and do anything and everything to remove their pastor from office.
In the process, the church will be destroyed for the foreseeable future, and can only survive intact if there’s a resurrection years later. Not pretty.
Which of my suggestions resonate with you?
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