Nine years ago, I was preparing to take a brief sabbatical at the church I pastored.
I had just finished the first draft of my doctoral project and sent it to my reader. I also spent a lot of time trying to prepare church leaders for my absence.
On the Sunday in September before my time away, I was presented with an early pastoral appreciation gift … a very generous check.
Three years later, I was presented with another pastoral appreciation check … six times less than I had received three years before.
Needless to say, I felt … can I say it … unappreciated.
I wrote an article a few years ago on how to appreciate your pastor. Now I’d like to write one on why you should appreciate your pastor.
Since October is Pastor Appreciation Month, let me share with you five reasons why churchgoers should appreciate their pastors:
First, your pastor said “yes” to God’s call.
When I was a staff member in a church four decades ago, one of the deacons continually gave me a hard time. When I asked my pastor how to interpret his behavior, the pastor told me that this deacon had been called by God into ministry, but had told God “no,” and had always felt guilty about his decision.
But every pastor – including yours – has said “yes” to the call of God.
When you submit yourself to that call, you don’t know in advance what it means … where you’ll live … how much money you’ll make … or what kind of leaders you’ll have to work with. So answering God’s call is an act of supreme faith.
In addition, that call usually involves receiving formal training for ministry, usually from a seminary.
In my case, it took me five years to earn my Master of Divinity degree because I had a full-time job when I was in school. I left seminary debt-free, but many pastors are still paying back student loans they assumed during their seminary days.
Your pastor has sacrificed himself and his family to serve at your church.
Can you appreciate your pastor for that?
Second, your pastor probably works extremely hard.
In 1 Thessalonians 5:12-13, Paul writes to the church at Thessalonica:
Now we ask you, brothers, to respect those who work hard among you, who are over you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other.
The first quality that Paul highlights in verse 12 is “those who work hard among you.”
Pastors work hard. It’s not just the number of hours they work every week – usually more than 50.
It’s the intensity and the unpredictability of the work as well.
Pastoral work is intense because most pastors want to do their work perfectly. They want to preach great sermons … counsel people so their problems are resolved … run the staff with efficiency and productivity … see their prayers for the sick and dying answered … and do it all without making a mistake. (Because when they do, they’re liable to hear about it.)
Pastoral work is also unpredictable because pastors don’t have set schedules. They don’t work 8-5 jobs. They have to be available when people need them … when they aren’t working … which means nights and weekends. In fact, I once heard Charles Swindoll say that churches whose pastors work several nights a week don’t tend to keep them.
My wife and I run a successful business together right now, and even though we work a combined 110-120 hours a week, we feel like we’re semi-retired because we have our nights and weekends free.
But in pastoral ministry, you have to work multiple nights a week … respond to emergencies on your day off … and do it all without knowing when you’ll have any “down time.”
In fact, you feel like you’re never off work, and that you’ll never finish working.
During my last ministry, I eventually wore down physically and emotionally because I couldn’t manage the ragtag schedule I felt was expected of me.
But somehow, your pastor is managing his schedule … doing his job … and showing up every Sunday.
Can you appreciate your pastor for that?
Third, your pastor has to endure a lot of internal flak.
Flak comes to a pastor in various ways: from notes written on welcome cards … emails he receives first thing Monday morning … anonymous letters … angry phone calls … and people who ask, “Pastor, can I come see you in your office? I have something I’d like to discuss with you.”
During a pastor’s second or third year, the critics tend to come out in full force. Sometime between years four and five, they coalesce and make their move, giving the pastor a subtle … or clear … ultimatum: “Either you leave or we will.”
According to church conflict expert Speed Leas, when a conflict hits this level, it cannot be resolved internally. The pastor and/or board must bring in an interventionist from the outside to resolve the conflict, or the church … and the major players … may be damaged for a long time.
And most of the time, the church tries to resolve it internally … and fails.
Surprisingly, if pastors survive such an attack, they don’t quit their position or find another career … they just keep going … and some will have their best years ahead.
Nearly thirty years ago, I spoke to the president of my denomination on the phone about the possibility of moving to another church. He told me that no matter where I went, I would have to pay a price. Churches won’t grow if they don’t change … but when the pastor tries to institute change, he’ll be vilified by those who like things the way they are.
You’re probably not aware of it, but your pastor receives a lot of criticism, yet shows up every Sunday with a smile and a word from God.
Can you appreciate your pastor for that?
Fourth, your pastor experiences intense external opposition.
The less effective your pastor is, the more Satan will leave him alone.
The more effective your pastor is, the more Satan will target him for destruction.
Years ago, I saw a Christian film called Whitcomb’s War (which predated Frank Peretti’s book This Present Darkness). A small church called a new pastor to lead them.
When the pastor started setting up his office, a group of demons gathered in the basement and planned their strategy to defeat him.
I don’t think we should attribute every conflict in a church to Satan. After all, human beings must bear responsibility for their own actions. But whenever deception and destruction are involved (John 8:44), Satan’s minions are definitely present.
Satan usually doesn’t defeat a pastor all at once. Instead, he wears the pastor down over time until he’s tired of the fight and needs to move off the front lines.
But most pastors stay on the front lines anyway because that is where God placed them.
Can you appreciate your pastor for that?
Finally, your pastor has persevered through many discouraging days.
During my second pastorate, I was so discouraged that I wanted to quit every other Monday.
I read where Dallas Seminary professor Howard Hendricks said that he threatened to resign so many times that he finally wrote out a resignation letter and kept it in his desk.
That’s how I felt. Little that I did worked out. Most of what I tried bombed. In fact, I became so depressed I could barely function.
I felt like quitting. But what else was I going to do? Like Bill Hybels used to say, we’ve been had.
I didn’t know it then, but my best days were ahead of me … and all the lessons I’d acquired in my first nine years of relatively unsuccessful ministry prepared me for the next twenty years of very successful ministry.
Many times, Paul’s words in Galatians 6:9 have helped me keep going:
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Your pastor is still serving. He has hung in there and hasn’t given up.
In fact, he’s your pastor.
Can you appreciate him for that?
How will you show or tell him?
It has been years now since bullying from another staff member led to my resignation and I have not served a congregation since then. In honor of Pastor appreciation day and month a former colleague with whom I have maintained contact posted a message thanking a number of clergy in her life she wanted to recognize and included myself and another individual who are no longer serving congregations in part because of the difficulties that insured following a difficult departure from a church we served. It meant so very much it is hard to quite explain. But it is one of the amazing and difficult things with ministers is just how much your identity is wrapped up in being a minister. Often this ends up being a good thing and my sense of call and being a minister emerges in my work in any of a number of areas. It serves me much less when I let the regret and grief and other swirling feelings about not being engaged in the professional work of ministry prevent me from investing in other professional work. But in case people have a formerly active pastor in their life I would suggest maybe including them as one of the ministers you wish well this month.
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Very good counsel! I agree wholeheartedly with the idea that pastor appreciation should not just apply to a church’s current pastor and staff members, but also to former pastors who have meant a great deal. Hebrews 13:7 says, “Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith.” But most churchgoers forget their former leaders … even those who have helped them grow spiritually … after a brief time.
We have bullies everywhere: in business, in government, in education, and in our families. The one place where bullies shouldn’t exist is the local church. If bullying does exist, it’s only because a particular church tolerates it. Christians are notorious for letting bad behavior inside the church slide … even though they’ll protest bad behavior in the culture. I’m sorry that you had to endure that ordeal.
I agree with you about your ministerial identity. I will probably never serve in a local church again due to my age, but I still think like, talk like, feel like, and act like a pastor. Like you, I’m grateful for all the years the Lord gave me to serve Him … it all went by soooo fast … but I’m glad I can now rest from my labors.
Thanks again for reading and writing!
Jim
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