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When You Hear Rumors About Your Pastor

Posted in Church Health and Conflict, Conflict with the Pastor, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged 1 Timothy 5:19, hearing two sides of a story, Proverbs 18:17, rumors about a pastor on September 4, 2015| 2 Comments »

A woman my wife and I knew once called our house and angrily complained about her husband. In her mind, he had done some unspeakable things. She concluded her tirade with the words, “I am going to divorce him.”

She got on the phone and called many others. When some contacted us, they all said, “She wants to divorce him, and we told her that we agree with her.”

But I told my wife, “We’ve only heard one side of the story. We haven’t heard his side yet. Maybe the husband is totally guilty of the charges made against him. But maybe his wife is guilty of some misbehavior as well. Let’s not take her side or his side. Let’s remain on the side of the marriage.”

When we hear that someone we know and trust has done something wrong, we tend to become emotionally reactive.

We adopt the view of the person sharing the news with us … believe the news we hear completely … and thus prove ourselves to be foolish.

God’s Word encourages us never to believe the first thing we hear about a person.

Moses speaks to the judges in Israel in Deuteronomy 1:16-17:

“Hear the disputes between your brothers and judge fairly, whether the case is between brother Israelites or between one of them and an alien. Do not show partiality in judging; hear both small and great alike.”

Proverbs 18:17 adds:

The first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him.

Imagine that you attend the trial of a murder suspect. The prosecution takes three days to present its case, after which the judge vacates his bench, the press doesn’t show up anymore, and the defense is not allowed to present or cross-examine witnesses.

What would we call that?

A miscarriage of justice … if not a downright perversion.

But in thousands of churches, when people first hear a nasty rumor about their pastor, they not only tend to believe it … they pass the rumor on to others.

And every time someone passes on the rumor without first checking to see if its true, they put another nail in their pastor’s reputation and career.

I had a conversation with someone recently about her former pastor. This man taught a theology class I took in college and led a large church for many years.

But this pastor was driven out of his church, and I never heard exactly why. So I asked the woman, “What did the pastor do wrong?”

Since this woman hadn’t attended the church in years, she told me what a friend from the church once told her, but the evidence seemed purely circumstantial to me.

Maybe the pastor was guilty of a serious offense … but based on what little I heard, maybe he wasn’t.

Many years later, a new pastor came to the church, and wanting to lead the church with a clean bill of health, he brought that former pastor back and, on behalf of the church, apologized to him for the way he was driven away.

What a wise and healing thing to do! It’s done all too rarely these days.

If you hear an unflattering rumor about your pastor, I encourage you to do the following:

First, never believe the first thing you hear.

The initial reports are likely to contain inaccuracies. For example, when there’s a mass shooting in our culture, how many times do we hear the number of victims revised upward but later downward? All the time. The same principle is true in churches.

Second, ask your informant where they got their information.

If it’s from a former disgruntled staff member, or a rebellious board member, or a chronic complainer, suspend your judgment until you know more. And if your informant received their information from an unreliable source, remain skeptical.

Third, contact the pastor directly and ask him about the rumor.

The quicker you go to the primary source, the better-informed you’ll be. If you don’t know the pastor, or you’re afraid to approach him, ask someone from his family or someone who knows him well. But don’t short-circuit this step.

Several decades ago, I knew a young couple who were engaged to be married. The woman didn’t tell her fiancée that she was pregnant until her seventh month, and he was devastated. I went to see him, but everything I said was later twisted. For example, I told him that I wanted him to stay in the church, but a report came back that I told him that I didn’t want him in the church, which was entirely false.

But I wonder how many people heard that rumor and instantly believed it?

Fourth, contact several wise individuals in your church and ask them how to interpret the rumors.

Every church has godly men and women who have witnessed everything under the sun in church life. Ask them if they’ve heard the rumor. If they haven’t, share what you know. They may choose to conduct a small investigation and then let you know what they’ve learned.

Fifth, wait until you know the facts before deciding to support the pastor or leave the church.

When conflict is present in churches, people become anxious. They want to know what’s going on and seek a quick resolution to the problem. They don’t like matters to remain open-ended; they want closure.

So some people will choose to believe the rumors right away and then demand the pastor’s resignation, but such action is usually premature until the rumors have been investigated.

Several months ago, I read about a church where the pastor was accused of some serious charges. The pastor chose not to resign but to let the charges be investigated. Several months later, he was completely exonerated of all charges.

Wouldn’t you have looked foolish if you had prematurely called for his resignation?

The apostle Paul made matters very clear in 1 Timothy 5:19. Paul told his protégé Timothy:

Do not entertain an accusation against an elder [includes pastors] unless it is brought by two or three witnesses.

There must be witnesses. There must be facts. There must be an investigation.

Rumors alone should never convict a pastor of wrongdoing.

I beg you: resolve before God that if you ever hear an unflattering rumor about your pastor … or any pastor … that you will heed the words of James 1:19:

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry …

Isn’t this the way you’d like to be treated by others?

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Six Reasons Why God Allows Pastors to be Terminated

Posted in Burnout and Depression in Ministry, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with the Pastor, Healing After Leaving a Church, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged reasons why pastors are terminated, why God lets pastors be fired, why God permits pastoral termination on September 1, 2015| Leave a Comment »

I have a friend who is fond of saying, “Getting fired is the best thing that ever happened to me.”

In the long run, his sentiment may very well be true … but it sure doesn’t feel that way at the time.

When I was pushed out of my position as senior pastor of an impactful church, I could not see what God was doing.

Six years later, I have a much better … and broader … perspective.

If you are struggling with why God allowed you to undergo the horror of a forced termination … or if you know someone who has endured this experience … maybe the following words can provide some insight and comfort.

Why does God allow pastors to be terminated?

First, the pastor has done something that disqualifies him from church ministry.

Many years ago, I heard about the moral downfall of a nationally known preacher.

This man had been called to lead a megachurch where some family and friends of mine had once attended.

When the news broke, I channel surfed until I found a well-known entertainment program. One of the show’s reporters interviewed that pastor outside his home. The pastor told the reporter, “Because of what I did, I have no business being a pastor.”

The host of the program commented, “The minister’s attitude is refreshing.”

I have a friend who served on that church’s staff at the time, and he told me that surveillance cameras confirmed that inappropriate behavior on the pastor’s part had taken place.

Being human, pastors occasionally engage in moral failure. When they’re caught, they usually repent and resign.

But sometimes pastors are successful at dodging congregational surveillance … but they can never escape the watchful eye of Almighty God.

A pastor can be guilty of sexual immorality … plagiarism … alcoholism … criminal behavior … drug addiction … lying and manipulation … or any number of other offenses against God and His people.

And if a pastor’s spiritual and moral integrity are compromised by his actions … especially if he’s unrepentant … then the best thing for everyone involved is for the pastor to leave … and hopefully, repent and receive God’s forgiveness for his actions.

While pastors do disqualify themselves by engaging in misconduct, this is only true of 7% of all terminated pastors.

Just as Peter denied Jesus three times but was restored to ministry, I believe that God can restore and use a once-disqualified pastor again.

Second, the pastor was leading a spiritually hollow congregation.

No matter how devoted a pastor is to Jesus … or how hard he works … or how much influence he has … some churches are never going to grow or have much impact in their community.

In fact, some churches are filled with professing Christians who have rarely if ever grown spiritually.

Unfortunately, I’ve met my share of these people.

For example, the first church I pastored … in Silicon Valley … never should have gotten off the ground.

The congregation began with 38 members … all refugees from other churches. They had one thing in common: they wanted to attend a church where they could control the decision making.

The church was financially subsidized by a denomination. The basic rule-of-thumb is that a church needs to become self-supporting after three years. If not, those outside funds are usually cut off.

When I arrived, the church had been in existence for five years … all five subsidized by the denomination.

Looking back, there was little spiritual vitality in that church. The leaders were full of bitterness and legalism.

Two years after my arrival, a sister church invited us to merge with them, and my first church passed out of existence.

That church never should have been started … never should have been subsidized … and was never going to last very long. In fact, they probably hurt more people than they helped.

I wasn’t terminated from that church … I ended up pastoring the merged church instead … but I can only imagine what it’s like to pastor a spiritually empty church for years.

It’s probably better that the pastor goes first than that he goes down with the ship.

Third, the pastor was delivered before things became much worse.

When I counsel pastors who are under attack … or who have undergone a forced exit … I often quote 2 Peter 2:9 to them.

Speaking of Lot, Peter says, “… the Lord knows how to rescue godly men from trials …” Another version states, “… the Lord knows how to deliver the righteous …”

Sometimes when a pastor initially comes to a church, the wind is at his back.

But by the time he leaves, the wind is blowing directly into his face.

When I first came to my last church, I felt the wind at my back. It seems like every idea I had … every sermon I preached … every ministry I started … had an impact.

But by the time I left, almost none of my ideas had been adopted for months … many of my sermons were falling flat … and the one ministry I wanted to start was soundly rejected.

The wind was blowing in my face … hard … and I could feel it.

Was I the problem? Possibly. But to be honest, I didn’t know how to work with some of the church’s newer leaders. I was oriented toward outreach, while they were oriented toward survival and maintenance.

Looking back, it was inevitable that we would clash.

Had I stayed even another year, I believe my soul might have been severely damaged. God in His mercy knew exactly when to remove me.

Did I like the way God chose to do it? No. But I wholeheartedly agree with His timing.

Months after I left, someone told me that if I visited the church again, I would no longer recognize it. A friend visited and told me, “The spirit has gone from this place.”

I’m glad I wasn’t there to see it.

Fourth, the pastor has been given a more suitable assignment by God.

I don’t like to demean my former calling, but pastors are a dime a dozen. There are thousands of pastors all over America … and thousands more who wish they could be pastors.

A pastor may be special to his congregation … and maybe his community … but in the Christian world, pastors aren’t treated with much respect or dignity simply because there are so many of them.

I believe there are times when God surveys all those pastors and says, “I have some assignments that I need to have fulfilled in the days ahead, so I choose you … you … and you to carry them out. But first, I need to remove you from your present position.”

If God didn’t remove us … and use some pretty forceful means at His disposal … we’d hold onto our pastorates for dear life.

I have met scores of former pastors doing significant kingdom work.

One man was forced out of three churches … and now he does conflict mediation for churches.

Another man was forced out of two churches … and he now trains Christian leaders for short-term assignments all over the world.

Pastors who were once forced out of their churches now lead missionary agencies … serve as hospital chaplains … plant churches … engage in hospice ministry … serve as church planters … do interim pastorates … and even have writing ministries.

And yes, I know pastors who were once pushed out of their churches who have healed enough to become pastors once again.

For my colleagues who have been forced out of a church … maybe God wants you to look forward toward a new assignment rather than ruminating about the injustices of your previous assignment.

But expect for that process to take you some time.

Fifth, the pastor was pushed out because he was burned out.

Back in the mid-1980s, I did a lot of reading about the symptoms and effects of being stressed out and burned out in church ministry.

I especially devoured the book by Dr. Archibald Hart titled Coping with Depression in the Ministry and Other Helping Professions.

Over the years, I thought I was suffering from burnout on several occasions. I visited a Christian counselor friend who assured me that I was not experiencing burnout.

But six years ago this summer, I visited a counselor who told me that I was experiencing a severe case of burnout, and that I was primed for a breakdown.

When I asked my wife, “How did burnout creep up on me?”, she said, “Jim, look what you’ve done the past few years here at the church. You oversaw the construction of a building and you completed your Doctor of Ministry program.”

Just last week, I remembered two statistics that I had long forgotten.

First, I remember hearing that 70% of all pastors leave their churches within one year of completing a building program.

Our entire building program lasted at least four years, and I stayed four years after that.

By contrast, I know a pastor who told me that he left two churches that were in the middle of building programs.

Second, a professor from my seminary told me that 50% of all Doctor of Ministry graduates end up leaving the pastorate so they can pursue other ministry avenues.

I lasted two years after receiving my degree.

I think most pastors do what I did: they minimize all the energy they’re expending when they’re carrying out a task, but it eventually catches up with them.

My last few months as a pastor, I wasn’t myself. I became detached … irritable … empty … and sad. In fact, I was near tears almost every day.

I wish someone who knew me had intervened and said, “Hey, Jim, you don’t seem like yourself right now. Is everything okay? We love you and want you to be your best.”

For whatever reason, no one did that … until the counselor gave me his diagnosis.

I believe that burned out pastors probably need to leave their ministries so they can recover. Their churches need more energy from them than they can muster.

But pastors become burned out because they work too hard and care too much, and it seems criminal to me to kick out a pastor in a mean-spirited way because he did his job too well.

So sometimes Jesus says to His weary servants, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest” (Mark 6:31).

And He kindly calls His burned out pastors away from church ministry.

Finally, the pastor’s ministry in that church is over.

Several years ago, I visited a large church and was invited to sit next to the chairman of the board during the service.

Over the previous few years, the church had lost half its attendees.

The music was horrible (the full-time worship director led three songs by himself, without a band), the service was disorganized, and everything seemed irrelevant.

When I told the chairman that the pastor seemed to be preaching well, he said, “His last few sermons have been better because he’s retiring in several weeks.”

That pastor led that church for more than 30 years … but his ministry had ended long before he retired.

I wish that every pastor was given the ability to choose when his ministry in a particular church was finished.

The problem is … the pastor is often the last one to know.

And so God in His sovereignty sometimes says to a pastor, “You’re not going to leave here, are you? You’re so very committed … and I appreciate that more than you could know. But I can see the way ahead, and you’re not the pastor this church needs anymore. You’ve done all that I asked you to do … so I’m going to remove you from office … and it’s going to sting.”

And it does sting … for a long time.

I served the Lord in church ministry for 36 years. I hoped that I would get to retire on my own terms around age 65, but the truth is that God declared my ministry over nearly ten years before I would have stopped.

But I’m glad He did … because right now, I am far happier and fulfilled than I was as a pastor … and I’m still involved in significant ministry.

Jesus trained at least 18 years for a ministry that lasted only three. In the end, even the Son of God didn’t get to choose when His ministry was over … the Father did … and the Son cried out from the cross, “It is finished.”

I wonder why God doesn’t intervene and stop innocent pastors from being terminated.

In fact, I’ve devoted my life to doing all I can to help pastors and boards part ways (when necessary) in a truthful, loving, and constructive way.

But regardless of how a pastor is let go … even when it’s done cruelly … every pastor can repeat what Joseph said to his brothers in Genesis 50:20:

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good …”

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Preaching and Pastoral Termination

Posted in Conflict with Church Antagonists, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with the Pastor, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged how preaching creates conflict, preaching and pastoral exits, preaching and pastoral resignations on August 10, 2015| Leave a Comment »

“If you can preach, people will forgive you for all kinds of mistakes, but if you can’t preach, they will nail you on everything they can.”

That’s a paraphrase of what a megachurch pastor once said during chapel when I was in seminary … and there’s a lot of truth in that observation.

For a long time, I have believed that the primary way for a pastor to create conflict in his church is to promote change without first receiving the approval of the board, staff, and key leaders.

Change creates anxiety … causes people to complain … the complainers organize … they oppose the change maker … and if he doesn’t comply with their wishes … they strategize his demise.

But I have a theory … and I haven’t read this anywhere … that preaching may ultimately be the primary source of conflict in a local church.

Let me make my case:

First, the pastor is the only authority figure in modern life who tells people collectively how to live.

When I saw my doctor recently, he offered a few suggestions for helping me to become more healthy … but he did not gather all his patients in a room and bring us a lecture.

When I see a politician giving a speech on television, if he’s too prescriptive (Americans need to drive less, cut our electrical use, conserve water) I might talk back to him or change the channel.

All week long, we resist people in our lives who tell us how to live … even if they’re experts in their field.

And then we come to church on Sunday.

And what happens? A man stands up … using the Bible as his source … and tells us: “You need to trust God more … humble yourself before the Lord … share your faith with your neighbors … treat your wife better … be honest at work … obey our country’s leaders …” and so on.

If we believe the Bible … and we like the pastor … and we’re walking with the Lord … we’ll want to comply with the pastor’s directives.

But if we don’t believe Scripture … or we dislike the pastor … or we’re not walking with God (and this incorporates a large percentage of any congregation) then we may very well resist the pastor’s words.

Paul … Stephen … Peter and John … all were persecuted because of their preaching.

They didn’t arouse opposition because they were disorganized administrators … or insensitive counselors … or poor staff supervisors … or even weak leaders.

No, they aroused opposition because of their preaching … just like Jesus did.

Sometimes it doesn’t even matter what a pastor says … just that he’s the one saying it.

My guess is that people complain more about their pastor during the two hours after he’s preached than during the rest of the week combined.

Why? Because he’s just finished telling them how to live … and they don’t like it.

Second, the pastor arouses rebellion by preaching against specific sins.

If a pastor preaches against the sins of others, we’re all for him.

But when he starts preaching against our sins, we may very well rebel.

And if he doesn’t stop, we may even seek to take him out.

I think it’s safe to say that if John the Baptist were around today, he wouldn’t have a large congregation. His preaching was too specific … too condemning … and way too personal.

Yet Herod Antipas liked to listen to John preach. Mark writes that “Herod feared John and protected him, knowing him to be a righteous and holy man” (Mark 6:20).

But Herod’s wife Herodias felt differently: “So Herodias nursed a grudge against John and wanted to kill him” (Mark 6:19). Why did she feel that way? “For John had been saying to Herod, ‘It is not lawful for you to have your brother’s wife'” (Mark 6:18).

It took Herodias a while, but she finally took John out … for good … because he was preaching directly at an area of her life (marriage) where she refused to change.

It’s possible for one family member to love the pastor’s preaching … and for another member to hate it … even though the pastor has no idea who feels which way.

Whenever I preached against a specific sin … and if you’re being honest with the biblical text, you have to so … I hoped that my preaching would cause people to experience immediate transformation in that area of their life.

But sometimes, preaching causes sin to surface in someone’s life … at least for a few minutes. If people repent, they’ll grow spiritually. But if they resist, they’ll blame the messenger for coughing up their pain.

The experts tell us that it only takes 7 to 10 people to force out a pastor in any size church.

My guess is that a high percentage of those individuals are getting back at the pastor for preaching against specific sins in their lives … even if they aren’t conscious of it … and won’t ever admit it.

Third, the pastor’s authority, words, and manner can arouse open resistance.

Resistance toward preaching takes various forms:

*Not showing up. During the final few months of my last church ministry, one board member in particular stopped coming to worship services. I’d look down and see his wife … smiling … but he wasn’t sitting next to her … and I knew that wasn’t a good sign.

*Wandering around in the back. In that same church, another board member never brought his Bible … and spent his time during my sermon doing everything besides sitting down and listening to the sermon.

*Watching from another room. Still another board member from that church wouldn’t come into the worship center, but watched the service from a monitor in an adjoining room.

*Crossing arms. My worst all-time antagonist once left the church for a year, then returned on a Sunday when I was preaching through Mark and spoke about Herod Antipas executing John the Baptist. The antagonist sat twenty feet away from me with his arms folded … staring me down … then complained to the board chairman that I aimed the sermon at him. I will never forget his body language that day because he launched a rebellion soon afterwards.

*Rarely looking up. I’ve written before about a board member who spent 90% of the sermon time reading the notes in his Scofield Bible. If all the pastor ever sees while preaching is the tops of some people’s heads … and they won’t look at him … that may signal resistance in action.

*Criticism after the sermon. One time, when I served as guest speaker at a church, a staff member came to the front to make the announcements after I spoke, and tried to rebut something I said during the message. I’m not sure everyone caught it, but I sure did.

This resistance could be to the pastor as a person … or a leader … or a counselor … and be communicating the message, “I don’t like or respect you, so I certainly don’t want to listen to you.”

But it could also be resistance to the pastor’s tone … speaking style … use of language … stories … cadence … sense of authority … or any one of a hundred other things.

Whether the pastor’s preaching reveals or causes resistance, though, there is no doubt that most church antagonists find fault with their pastor’s preaching … even if they never tell him to his face … but discerning observers may very well notice.

Finally, the pastor claims to be speaking for God … but some hearers just won’t buy it.

I was a pastor for 36 years. During that time, what give me the right to stand up and tell people how to live?

In my mind, I was called by God to speak the Word of God to the people of God. Any authority I had came from God’s call to ministry and from using Scripture as my authority.

While a pastor is speaking, many of his hearers identify him as God’s messenger … and sometimes, with God Himself.

And whether they’re conscious of it or not, they can project their feelings about God onto their pastor.

If they’re angry with God, they can become angry with their pastor. If they’re disappointed with God, they can become disillusioned with his messenger. If they’re wounded because God hasn’t protected them from suffering, they can blame God’s servant for the way they feel.

Seven years ago, I gave a message called “Defending Biblical Marriage.” Using Matthew 19:4-6 as my text, I stated that Jesus reiterated that God designed marriage to be between one man and one woman.

Without my knowledge, a board member and his wife invited a journalist from the local paper to hear me speak that day. Being an unbeliever, I heard that she did not like my message … and later on, that leader asked me not to speak anymore on controversial issues.

But I couldn’t do that. I had taken a vow at my ordination … which none of the board members knew about … that I would preach the whole counsel of God … which, in my mind, means that I am free to speak on any and every issue as long as I’m basing my remarks on the authority of God’s Word.

It is entirely possible that the ensuing conflict in my church was launched after I gave that message.

A colleague of mine who does church interventions once told me that he visited a congregation that was having massive problems. As I recall, the pastor had been forced from office.

During his intervention, my colleague discovered that 14 church leaders were engaged in sexual immorality. 14!

Let’s say that you were the pastor of that church, and you were preaching through the Ten Commandments, and you came to the seventh commandment: “You shall not commit adultery.”

With 14 leaders violating that commandment, how do you think they would respond to you?

They’d want your head.

Yes, conflict often arises in the church parking lot … and inside staff offices … and through cell phones … and during board meetings.

But my theory is that conflict originates more often inside the worship center during the pastor’s sermon than in any other place in the community.

What are your thoughts on this issue?

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What’s the Real Story Behind Pastoral Terminations?

Posted in Conflict with Church Antagonists, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with the Pastor, Forgiveness and Reconciliation among Christians, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged private reasons why pastors are terminated, reasons why pastors are terminated, the real reasons why pastors are fired on July 28, 2015| Leave a Comment »

Whenever a pastor is forced out of his position, there are usually two stories as to what happened.

There’s the public version … designed to placate the pastor’s supporters and congregation.

Then there’s the real version … smothered beneath a pile of rhetoric and obfuscation.

In most cases, a pastor is accountable to some kind of governing board, whether they’re called elders, deacons, a council, a vision team … whatever.

When a pastor is dismissed, that board wants to say as little as possible to the church as a whole.

In some cases, they don’t want to make the pastor look bad … but in many cases, they don’t want to make themselves look bad.

So they try and smooth matters over by using phrases in public like, “We just felt it was time” or “We’re going in a different direction” or “If you knew what we know about the pastor, you’d have asked for his resignation, too.”

But so often, nobody ever mentions the real reasons why an innocent pastor was permanently exiled … so let me take a shot at it:

First, the pastor was gaining too much power.

This is especially true in small or rural churches where a family and their cohorts have run things for decades.

A new pastor is called to the church. He attracts lots of newcomers … who start serving in various ministries.

Some become leaders … and their allegiance is to the pastor … not to the board or even the church.

Feeling their power slipping away, the old timers resist the pastor’s leadership … resent his success … and finally decide, “He has to go.” (Of course, this is the same scenario that happened with Jesus and the Sanhedrin.)

Most of the time, the pastor’s detractors won’t even breathe what’s in their hearts to the pastor or his supporters. To criticize a pastor for bringing in new people looks petty … vindictive … and unspiritual.

This scenario often occurs when a church grows too fast too soon … or the pastor makes too many changes early in his ministry … but it can happen at any time during a pastor’s tenure.

And once the pastor has disappeared, the governing board is back in control … and get to choose any interims as well as the next pastor.

Second, the pastor was perceived as being too stubborn.

When I was in high school, I hung out with a group of friends who were all … and still are … great guys. They didn’t drink (around me, anyway) … didn’t take drugs … and didn’t cause trouble.

One Friday night after a football game, they wanted to drive by the home of a song leader they liked … honk a car horn … and yell. (It’s as close as they were ever going to get to her.) It was fine with me if they did it … I just thought it was stupid. So I asked to be taken home first.

Because I didn’t want to go with them, was I being stubborn or acting out of some kind of conviction?

I mention this because people … even board members … sometimes bring pastors stupid proposals … and if the pastor doesn’t say, “Oh, that’s a great idea!” he’s branded as being controlling … stiff-necked … and stubborn.

For twenty years, I wanted my ministry in churches to be characterized by four values: theological accuracy … moral integrity … methodological flexibility … and an outreach orientation.

I tried to be flexible with people’s suggestions and ideas as long as we didn’t sacrifice those values. But if somebody wanted me to bend on integrity … or stop caring about spiritually lost people … I simply wasn’t going to do it … and if I paid for my convictions by being terminated … so be it.

For example, most pastors believe they can only marry two Christians … not a Christian to a non-Christian. And if the daughter of the board chairman wants to marry an unbeliever … and the pastor refuses to perform their ceremony … his refusal may be termed “stubbornness” rather than “a biblical and personal conviction.”

I honestly think that many members of the church staff and board don’t understand how strongly most pastors hold their convictions … so maybe pastors need to do a better job of explaining in public why they believe what they do … even if people don’t understand or like what he’s saying.

But when a stubborn pastor meets a stubborn board … the pastor is usually the one who takes a hike.

Third, the pastor personally offended someone who wouldn’t forgive him.

If we could see into the hearts of God’s people, this reason just might emerge as Number One.

Being human and flawed, pastors sin against people at times.

I’d like to think that when a pastor is aware of his sin against someone, he seeks that person out … apologizes to them … receives verbal forgiveness … and their relationship continues unabated.

But there are two common scenarios where these steps are circumvented … or discarded altogether:

*The pastor has said or done something that offends someone … but the pastor doesn’t know anything about it.

The pastor could have said something that offended someone from the pulpit … or in a private conversation … or in a church communique … but the person offended never talks to the pastor about it.

But rather than forgive him unilaterally … or talk with the pastor personally … this individual starts finding fault with the pastor on many levels … completely hiding what their real motivation is.

How can the pastor ever make such an offense right? He can’t.

*The pastor finds out that he hurt someone and apologizes for his actions … but the person offended either won’t forgive him or … more likely … says he or she forgives him but really doesn’t.

How can the pastor make that situation right? Once again … he can’t.

The real offense in this scenario is not that the pastor said or did something wrong … it’s that the person the pastor hurt refuses to forgive him from the heart … because they view his offense as unforgivable.

Hebrews 12:15 says, “See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”

Many Christians believe that the “bitter root” refers to a believer who is angry with someone else and won’t forgive them … but in context, it seems to refer to a Christian who is so bitter against another believer that their anger spreads inside the congregation and poisons many.

If true, how ironic that a congregation that preaches forgiveness to sinners might expel their pastor because a single person refused to forgive him!

But sadly, the pastor might never discover the real reason for his departure.

Fourth, the pastor offended a group that threatened, “Either he goes or we go.”

I remember reading about a prominent megachurch pastor who angered some long-time families in his congregation.

The pastor was trying to make changes to their worship services. He went through the proper channels … the staff, the official board, worship team personnel … but there was one group he didn’t consult: those with old money.

They weren’t in positions of official power anymore, but when they heard about the pastor’s proposed changes, they went berserk because in their eyes, they were important … and he should have run everything by them.

(This story reminds me of the truism: small churches have small problems … while big churches have big problems.)

Due to the criticisms leveled against him, this megachurch pastor … someone I knew many years ago … resigned his ministry after 14 successful years.

The conflict made the local newspaper, which is where I read about the charges made by the people with old money.

If those making this ultimatum are good friends with members of the official board … if they hold important leadership positions … if they are wealthy and/or generous donors … then more often than not, this tactic will work … and the board will send the pastor packing.

But chances are poor that the pastor will ever hear anything about it.

Finally, the pastor was hit with an allegation that he couldn’t address in public.

One pastor told me that an older woman in his congregation threatened to make some charges against him and circulate them throughout the church.

The pastor knew that the charges were false, but he also knew that if they got out, some people would automatically believe them and insist that he resign … or threaten to leave themselves … so he quit instead.

I love Christ’s church, but I can’t stand this kind of lying. I just hate it.

This is not who Jesus is … nor who Jesus wants His people to be … and it’s exactly what Satan wants: to make a spiritual leader quit based on deception and destruction.

Once a false accusation hits the ecclesiastical grapevine, a pastor is toast unless the church/board provides him with a quick and credible way of defending himself in public.

And sadly, most churches lack such a mechanism.

If I was a member of a church board, I would not let my pastor be driven out of the church based on a lie … even if I thought his best days were behind him.

In fact, I’d do the following things:

*track down the source of the false charge

*confront the person making the allegation and ask them to repent … and ask them to leave the church if they didn’t

*ask the pastor to respond to the allegation in public as soon as possible

*support the pastor’s version of events in public

*teach the church that Christians never use the devil’s tactics to do God’s work

How could I as a spiritual leader allow Satan to have free reign in Christ’s church?

Power struggles … pastoral convictions … bitter parishioners … group threats … and false allegations … these are among the real reasons why pastors are terminated in our day.

But I believe there’s one more reason that I haven’t yet mentioned that towers above them all … and I promise to write a separate article about it soon.

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When Should the Pastor of a Church in Steady Decline Leave?

Posted in Change and Conflict in Church, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with the Pastor, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged dismissing a pastor due to attendance decline, dismissing a pastor due to lack of growth, terminating a pastor due to attendance decline, terminating a pastor due to lack of growth on July 22, 2015| Leave a Comment »

Several years ago, I visited a large church where the attendance had been plunging.

A key leader told me that the average Sunday morning attendance had once been 1300 but was now 650 … and yet the same pastor was still there.

The church had declined by 50% over the past few years.

Should that pastor have been allowed to stay … or should he have been let go when the church declined by 10% … or 20% … or 35%?

This makes me wonder: at what point should the pastor of a church that’s steadily shrinking be terminated?

This question makes two assumptions:

*that the pastor of a church is ultimately (not totally) responsible for its success or failure, and …

*that there is a point at which church leaders need to dismiss the pastor to preserve their church.

I confess that I don’t have a ready answer for this question … yet … but I plan on consulting with experts over the next few months to see if I can find a consensus.

In the meantime, let me offer a few observations on this topic:

First, many declines occur because a pastor is experiencing burnout.

When a pastor is stressed out, his body becomes unhealthy because he’s overwhelmed by all the demands upon him.

When a pastor is burned out, his emotions become unhealthy because his caring mechanisms are fried.

You can recover from being stressed out by renegotiating your job description … taking better care of your body … doing more things you enjoy … and taking time off.

You can recover from burnout only by taking extended time off … but even then, it’s usually delaying the inevitable.

One well-known pastor feared he was nearing burnout, so he took more than six months off. When he returned, he served for a short while and then retired.

Time off will cure distress, but it usually won’t cure burnout. As Dr. Archibald Hart says, burnout is often the beginning of the end of a ministry.

The burned-out pastor lacks internal motivation. He can only accomplish minimal tasks, like preaching … attending staff and board meetings … and keeping basic appointments.

He also can’t handle people’s problems like he once did. They deplete him of badly needed energy. It’s not that he doesn’t care … he does. It’s that he’s cared about people’s problems so long that they’ve worn him down … a condition Dr. Hart terms “compassion fatigue.”

But here’s the killer: the burned out pastor doesn’t want to see people. He just wants to hide from them. He can’t greet people on Sunday … can’t relate effectively to church leaders anymore … and becomes unpredictable.

And if people don’t feel their pastor cares about them anymore, some may stop attending.

For a church to grow, the pastor needs to be in top shape spiritually, physically, and emotionally. And when he’s emotionally drained, he’ll need months off to recover … and even then, there’s no guarantee that he’ll return healed.

Here’s the tipoff: if a pastor once led the church to growth … but that same church is now in steep decline … he may be burned out without knowing it.

There’s only one way to tell: the pastor has to visit a Christian counselor … take some assessments … and receive a diagnosis from that counselor.

I don’t think that Christians should condemn pastors who have experienced burnout. Sometimes the cause of the burnout is inside that pastor … but other times, it’s found in the way the church functions. Because the pastor burned out trying to serve the Lord, I believe that the church should pick up the tab for his counseling and treat him with dignity and respect.

And if church leaders decide they can’t wait for the pastor to recover, they should let him take some time to look for a new job … and offer him a generous severance package.

But too many pastors fear that if they are diagnosed with burnout, they will be terminated immediately … so they stay in hopes they will recover … which ensures that the church will continue to decline numerically.

Second, many declines occur because the pastor has to control everything.

I recently attended a church where the pastor announced that there was going to be a barbecue … and that he was going to be cooking the hamburgers.

That might be okay in a church of 25 that’s full of invalids, but this is a church of several thousand.

That pastor may be trying to send the message, “Since my whole ministry is about service, I am not above getting greasy for my congregation.”

But he may also be sending this message: “I’m the only person around here who really knows how to cook good hamburgers.”

I believe that a pastor needs to be “in touch” with every ministry in the church. He needs to know what’s going on with the children’s ministry … the young couples … the seniors … and the music. In fact, people expect this.

But many pastors end up sending this message instead: “I know how to do everything at this church, and I can do things better than anyone else. In fact, if I could just clone myself many times over, this church would grow into the stratosphere.”

Control freak pastors can usually grow a church up to a certain point, and then things start to go south.

The pastor doesn’t trust others … and they can sense it. He doesn’t believe others are competent … and they feel rejected.

And when the church begins to decline, the pastor doubles down and tries to control things even more … leading to further decline.

Can control freak pastors change? Maybe … but they have to unlearn some habits first … and learn how to turn over responsibility to others … even if those others aren’t as gifted as their pastor.

And if a pastor doesn’t see the problem … or refuses to change … church leaders need to request his resignation and find somebody who will trust the congregation.

Third, many declines occur because the pastor has no plan to turn things around.

Nearly a year ago, I attended BridgeBuilder training with Dr. Peter Steinke in St. Paul, Minnesota.

I can still hear Dr. Steinke sharing some case studies with the dozen of us in attendance. He said that many times when he consults with a church in conflict, he keeps asking the same question:

“What’s the plan?”

The pastor has to know the plan … and communicate that plan to the board, staff, and congregation … or the church may start to drift and fall into decline.

If a pastor’s primary gifting is shepherding, he’ll usually find himself in a small church … and be very content.

If a pastor’s primary gifting is teaching, he’ll usually find himself in a medium to large church setting.

If a pastor’s primary gifting is leadership, he’ll usually find himself in a large church or a megachurch.

Some pastors who are great teachers and shepherds can only take a church so far. They may have learned some leadership skills, but God never gave them leadership gifts. They may need to step aside so that someone with leadership gifts can take the church to the next level.

However, there are many ways to create a plan for growth:

*the pastor can attend a turnaround conference (preferably with key staff and church leaders)

*the pastor/board can hire a church consultant

*the pastor can solicit ideas from the congregation and key leaders and create a plan that starts from the bottom up

*the pastor can lead the charge to add an additional worship service

*the pastor can find a coach/mentor who will help him improve his skills and boldness

But without a plan … that everybody knows … the church will continue to drift and decline.

And if a pastor can’t … or won’t … create that plan … I believe he needs to go.

Finally, many declines are not the pastor’s fault … but he may need to leave anyway.

Back in the late 1990s, I pastored a church in Silicon Valley. It was a very exciting, cutting edge church, and in many ways, we were ahead of our time technologically.

But on Mother’s Day in 1997, the owner of the building we were renting told us that he wasn’t going to let us renew our lease. (This was around the time of the dotcom boom and he could make more money renting to someone other than a church.)

The only building we could find to rent was the cafeteria at Homestead High School in Cupertino (where Steve Jobs from Apple went) … five miles from our previous building.

When we made the move, we lost 1/3 of our people … those who lived in the opposite direction from our previous meeting place … overnight.

That was the end for me.

Nobody asked me to leave. I just knew it was time. It took us several years to find and assimilate those people that left … and it would take us several more years to regain the same amount of people.

And I lacked the drive and energy to do that.

The best chance the church had to grow again was for me to leave … and for the church to call a pastor with fresh energy and vision.

_______________

I once attended a conference at a very visible megachurch. Their attendance had declined by 2,000 per Sunday one year, and they took some steps to turn things around … with the same pastor at the helm.

And since he’s an incredibly gifted leader, they did turn things around.

But I remember having lunch with another megachurch pastor a few years ago. He told me that when the attendance begins to decline at a church, that pastor needs to leave because the same person who presides over the decline usually can’t turn things around … so he negotiated a separation agreement and resigned.

Two questions for you:

First, how often can a pastor who presides over an attendance decline stay and turn things around?

Second, what’s the magic number (if any) for dismissal: 10% decline … 20% … 50% … or what?

Several months later, I consulted with some top Christian leaders and received their views on this topic. Here’s that article:

Turning Around a Declinling Church

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The Associate Pastor – Church Board Conspiracy

Posted in Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with Church Staff, Conflict with the Pastor, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged conflict between senior pastor and board, conflict between senior pastor and staff, senior pastor and associate pastor conflict on July 15, 2015| 4 Comments »

Pastor Mark still couldn’t believe it was really happening.

After twelve years of ministry as senior pastor of Mercy Church, Mark felt pressured to resign.

Many people concluded that Mark quit because he couldn’t get along with the board. That certainly seemed to be the case over the last few days of his tenure, but the truth was known only by a handful.

It wasn’t initially the church board that did in Mark … it was the associate pastor.

And the scenario I’m about to describe has become increasingly common.

Two years before Mark was forced to leave, he hired an associate pastor named Greg.

The church spent thousands of dollars moving Greg and his family to their community, and someone in the church let Greg rent their second house for a greatly reduced amount.

Greg was hired to do the things that Mark didn’t do well … or didn’t have time to do … and his five overall duties were all spelled out in his written job description.

Greg was responsible for running the small group ministry … overseeing the youth ministry … incorporating newcomers into the church … leading the men’s ministry … and starting several community outreach projects.

Right after Greg’s hiring, he began making plans for each of the five areas. And over the next eight months, he recruited leaders for those ministries … helped them find volunteers … did some training … and reported everything back to Mark.

So far, so good.

But as time went on, Greg’s ministries didn’t flourish … and three were on life support.

Greg was increasingly unhappy.

Why?

*Greg’s wife told him that he was a much better preacher and leader than Mark … and that he should request and receive a significant raise in the new budget. When he received a small cost-of-living raise after his first year, he sulked.

*Greg had also made some friends in the church … some of whom told him, “You should be pastor instead of Mark!” And Greg believed them.

*Greg gradually lost interest in small groups, incorporating newcomers, and community projects. In all honesty, he didn’t know what to do … chose not to tell Mark the truth … and faked his way along.

*Rather than doing what he was hired for, Greg spent his time goofing around online … talking on the phone with old friends … running errands for his family … and planning a mission trip that hadn’t been authorized.

Meanwhile, Mark was getting reports that the small group ministry was on life support … that only a few guests had returned for a second visit since Greg’s debut … and that the two community projects he started had both died.

Mark called Greg into his office one day and asked him for an honest progress report on each ministry.

Greg fudged … and bluffed … and lied.

Mark was justifiably upset. The church had invested a lot of time and money in Greg, and he didn’t seem to be working out. Mark told Greg, “If your performance doesn’t improve, we’re going to have to reevaluate our relationship.”

Greg went home and told his wife what Mark had said … and she hit the roof … and the telephone.

What she should have said was, “Greg, are you working a full week? Are you giving God and His people your best? Are you doing what Mark wants you to do?”

But she told him instead, “You are twice the leader Mark will ever be! You should be the pastor of Mercy Church! What does Mark know? I’ve lost all respect for him.”

Greg was visibly upset … afraid for his job … and even his career.

He decided to contact a board member named Phil who had invited him out to lunch twice before.

The two of them met at Chili’s … where Greg told Phil:

“I don’t feel fulfilled right now at Mercy.”

“I’m not sleeping well … eating right … or able to focus on my ministry duties because I’m so upset with Mark.”

“I feel I’ve done a great job at Mercy, but Mark doesn’t agree, and he may be close to firing me.”

“My wife is upset, too, and she’s becoming a basket case.”

“I just want to serve the Lord without interference.”

The entire future of Mercy Church will be determined by what Phil does next.

He should tell Greg, “I’m sorry things aren’t working out, but Mark is your boss, and I support him fully. Unless Mark is guilty of a major offense (heresy, sexual immorality, criminal behavior, verbal abuse), I’m not going to tell him how to run the staff. You either need to do what Mark wants you to do or look for another job.”

But all too many board members reply, “Oh, Greg, I’m so sorry that Mark has hurt you. That’s terrible! Let me take your concerns to a couple other board members. We’ll see what we can do to help you.”

Without realizing it, many board members end up sabotaging their pastor’s ministry by:

*siding with the complaining staff member.

*failing to inform the senior pastor of the staff member’s complaint.

*taking responsibility for the staff member’s feelings.

*telling other board members about the complaint.

*neglecting to tell the staff member to shape up or ship out.

Here is what happens all too often:

Phil contacts two other board members and passes on Greg’s complaints. They listen to Phil … contact Greg and listen to him … never ask Mark for his side … conclude that “we must keep Greg” … and undermine Mark’s authority as staff supervisor.

And once Greg’s complaints are out in the open and unresolved … Phil spreads Greg’s complaints to other board members … some of whom take Greg’s side and add their own complaints against Pastor Mark.

This process can flourish underground for several months until:

*the complaining virus has spread throughout the board … to board member’s wives … and to several key leaders.

*the board reaches critical mass that Mark is a bad guy who has to go.

*the board makes this decision between board meetings … and without Mark’s knowledge.

When the board finally decides to speak with Mark about his tensions with Greg, the pastor:

*claims he isn’t aware of any tensions with Greg.

*feels that everything has been blown out of proportion.

*tells the board they have usurped his authority as staff supervisor.

*feels betrayed by a board that seemed completely loyal to him … until Greg showed up.

*doesn’t realize that the board has already sided with Greg over against their pastor.

Two weeks later, when Pastor Mark stands in front of the congregation and reads his letter of resignation, he probably won’t mention that Greg betrayed him … as did the entire church board.

He’ll trade that resignation letter for a separation package … and ask himself every day for months, “What in the world did I do wrong?”

Under this scenario, the answer is a pronounced, “Pastor, you did nothing wrong … except put too much trust in your associate and board members.”

The real culprits?

*A lazy and rebellious associate pastor.

*His jealous and bitter wife.

*A board member who allowed himself to be triangled (accept responsibility) for a problem that wasn’t his to resolve.

*Several other board members who foolishly sided with their new associate rather than their experienced and proven senior pastor. (The senior pastor had served the church faithfully and productively for years, unlike the associate.)

*A church system that rewards slothfulness and disloyalty.

In some cases, the board then turns around and asks the associate pastor to become either the interim pastor or to throw his hat into the ring to become senior pastor … and sometimes, that’s exactly what happens.

I once interviewed a pastor who had experienced this exact scenario.

One day, he was leading a megachurch.

The next Sunday, he was out … and his associate became senior pastor.

Why does this happen?

Because the church board … in their anxious, confused state … forget three basic principles:

*God has called the senior pastor to be staff supervisor … not the church board.

*God has called the associate pastor to serve under the senior pastor … not the church board.

*God has called the senior pastor to be accountable to the church board … not the associate pastor.

It all seems so simple on paper, does it not?

Then why don’t some church leaders carry this out in practice?

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How Does a Pastor Respond to False Allegations?

Posted in Conflict with Church Antagonists, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with the Pastor, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged accusing a pastor of wrongdoing, lying about a pastor, making accusations against a pastor, pastoral termination on June 23, 2015| 5 Comments »

Let’s imagine that you attend a church where you don’t like your pastor.

You don’t like his appearance … his manner … his family … or his preaching.

In fact, you’d prefer that he resigned and went far away so your church could hire a pastor you do like.

If you had a chance to push out your pastor, would you take it?

And if so, to what lengths would you go to get your way?

*Would you make up stories about him?

*Would you distort something he said?

*Would you spread a nasty rumor about his wife?

*Would you tell others that you saw him do something terribly wrong?

In other words, would you lie to get rid of him?

I’ve been hearing more and more stories about board members, staff members, and churchgoers who dislike their pastor so much that they’re willing to lie to force him to resign.

Since Christians believe that God’s Word is truth … and that Jesus is the truth … and that God’s people should only speak truth with each other … such lying is clearly wrong and out of place inside God’s covenant community.

But when people can’t push out their pastor using truth, they often resort to falsehoods … just as the Jewish leaders invented allegations about Jesus to destroy Him.

The lying is bad enough. It’s a negation of all that God wants His people to be and do.

But these same pastors tell me that when they finally become aware of the false allegations, they are not given any kind of a forum where they can respond to the lies.

In fact, sometimes they’re encouraged to resign … leaving their reputation in tatters.

Let me share an example.

Imagine that Clark has been the pastor at Harmony Church for twelve years. Lately, his wife has been feeling neglected … and she shares her feelings with a church friend named Donna.

In a weak moment, Donna shares that information with a friend from her small group named Betty … but Betty mixes up what Donna shares with something she heard from another friend … and Betty tells a couple of friends that the pastor and his wife may be headed for divorce.

Over the next three months, that allegation slowly makes its way throughout the church, where the charge is embellished … and now the pastor and his wife are divorcing because he’s having an affair.

The wife of a staff member hears it. The children of two board members hear it. Then a major church gossip hears it.

But the pastor and his wife don’t hear it … and remain unaware of what is being said about them … until the charge reaches critical mass … and comes to the attention of the church board.

Before the next board meeting, the chairman stops by Pastor Clark’s office … says that he suspects that Clark’s marriage is over … and that it would be best for the church if he would resign immediately.

Dumbfounded, Clark can’t believe what he’s hearing. He tells the chairman, “My marriage is just fine. Things have been a little strained at home because our daughter has been struggling with asthma … my wife’s brother has been ill … and the search for a new worship leader here at church has taken longer than expected. But I assure you, our marriage is great!”

But the chairman responds, “Look, Clark, it’s all over the church that you’re having an affair, and that’s the real reason why your marriage is ending. Why don’t you just stop playing games and admit it? Or would you rather force the board to fire you?”

You might think that the story I’ve just described is rather farfetched, but I assure you, it’s not.

And what Pastor Clark doesn’t know is that several people have added their own charges to the circulating charge of adultery.

It’s been going around that Clark mistreats staff … mismanages church funds … doesn’t work a full 40-hour week … and that his son is on drugs.

But not one of the charges made against him is true.

At this juncture, what can Pastor Clark do to correct the lies?

Here are five possibilities:

*The pastor can choose to say nothing … relying on God to defend his reputation and position.

Over the years, I have heard many Christian leaders advocate this approach. They say, “You don’t need to defend yourself. God will defend you.”

This approach … which certainly sounds spiritual … is the way that Jesus handled the accusations against Him before He went to the cross. 1 Peter 2:23 says about Jesus, “When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly.”

Pastors should follow Jesus’ example and not retaliate or make threats against their accusers. And they should entrust themselves to God the Father, who does judge justly.

But throughout His ministry, Jesus did defend Himself against various charges, as even a cursory reading of John 5-9 will make clear. The only time He didn’t defend Himself is when He knew it was His time to go to the cross.

And Paul defended himself as well against charges that he wasn’t a legitimate apostle in 2 Corinthians.

No, a pastor doesn’t need to respond to every little criticism that someone might be saying about him. The great British preacher Charles Spurgeon says that in such cases, a pastor needs to use “the blind eye and the deaf ear.”

But when public charges are going around about a pastor, if he doesn’t respond to them … clearly and quickly … his detractors will interpret his silence as proof that he’s guilty as charged.

In fact, the longer a pastor waits to respond to the charges, the more widespread they become … and the more people believe them.

*The pastor can call an emergency board meeting and respond to each allegation made against him.

But at this point, Clark only knows about the marriage/affair allegation. Even if he successfully knocks that one down, he isn’t aware that there are other allegations waiting for him.

The problem is that the board has already judged Pastor Clark as guilty as evidenced by their asking for his resignation. And once people take the position that their pastor needs to leave, they almost never reverse their position.

It might be wise for Clark to reach out to several board members that he knows personally to gauge how things look for him. Maybe he’ll find a sympathetic ear and that person can lobby the rest of the board on his behalf.

But at the very least, the board should meet with Clark and hear him out … with an open mind.

*The pastor can call a special congregational meeting and answer the allegations in public.

At first glance, this seems like a good idea. The pastor can speak directly to the congregation that he’s served for many years … hoping that his integrity and love will carry him through.

But the problem with this approach is that people who have never heard any of the allegations will now hear them for the first time … and some may believe them, regardless of how well Clark is able to defend himself.

In addition, if some people have convinced themselves that Clark needs to go, they may create more allegations during the meeting and throw them Clark’s way … even in an accusatory fashion.

And from the reports I’ve received, sometimes people won’t let the pastor defend himself. They either yell at him or boo him when he tries to speak. All some want to hear from him is, “I resign.”

I know one case where this approach worked … and I’m sure it’s worked in other situations. If a pastor still has the support of most of the congregation, it might be worth trying … but the pastor has to know going in that he’s going to be treated fairly … and if the congregation morphs into a mob, it will damage the pastor and the church for years.

*The pastor can write a document that lists each allegation along with his response.

This approach is helpful for two specific parties: the pastor and his supporters.

It can be therapeutic for a pastor to respond in writing to each allegation made against him. It can feel empowering … cleansing … and vindicating.

If the pastor then gives that document to his supporters, they will have the pastor’s defense in his own language. If it’s well-written and makes sense, that document will give the pastor’s supporters greater confidence in him … and may allow them to persuade people in their network that the pastor is innocent of the charges.

*The pastor can email his response to a few trusted supporters … confident that they will use it as needed.

*The pastor can email his response to the entire congregation … although his detractors will deconstruct, parse, and challenge every word … and even circulate their own responses.

*The pastor can send the document to the entire congregation via snail mail … where everyone will receive his letter at the same time … and it’s much more difficult to respond quickly to a letter than an email.

The disadvantage of this approach, though, is that almost nothing the pastor writes will convince the pastor’s detractors that he is innocent, because if he’s innocent, then they’re guilty of gossip … hatred … lying … and acting in an ungodly manner.

In other words, every time he’s proven right, they’re proven wrong.

There is one circumstance where I think this approach has merit: after a pastor has decided to resign.

In many cases, after a pastor’s last Sunday, people come out of the woodwork to trash his reputation. People feel free to hurl accusations at their former pastor … even though they never made those accusations to his face.

The pastor might give a defense of his ministry to some of his supporters and let them defend him after his absence.

*The pastor can insist that the board use a biblical process … either to accuse him or to clear his name.

Whenever allegations are flying around a church about a pastor, the anxiety in the congregation grows exponentially. In fact, people become so anxious that they spread the charges around almost without thinking.

The congregation then becomes a kangaroo court … charging and convicting the pastor without a shred of evidence.

Some people even engage in the wicked practice of “mobbing” a pastor … piling on false accusations until he quits.

This raises the question:

When allegations are being made about a pastor: does the pastor need to prove that he’s innocent … or does the board need to prove that he’s guilty?

I think the board needs to prove that he’s guilty.

So here’s a suggestion. Under such circumstances, the pastor might tell the board:

“I will not resign unless you use a biblical process to either convict or exonerate me. Since members of the board seem to think I’m guilty … and aren’t inclined to treat me impartially … I ask that the board and I select a team of five people from within the congregation to examine the charges against me. These people need to be spiritually mature, objective, and fairminded.

“I will take a leave of absence of two months. During that time, this Conflict Resolution Group will conduct an investigation into the charges made against me. They will interview those who have made those charges, and they will bring every charge to my attention so I can respond to each one.

“When their investigation is done, they will state whether I’m innocent or guilty of each charge made against me.

“If I’m guilty of any charge, I will admit wrongdoing and ask forgiveness. If I’m guilty of a major offense … such as heresy, adultery, or criminal behavior … I will resign.

“But if it turns out that I’m innocent of all charges, then I will be given the option of staying at the church or resigning with my head held high.

“Either way, I want this church to learn how to handle such charges in a biblical, loving, and just manner.”

I know Christian leaders who would conclude, “The pastor should just resign. Why prolong the pain? He’s toast and should just quit.”

But I would ask this question instead:

How will a church ever learn how to handle charges against their pastor in a spiritual rather than a political manner if a pastor is forced to resign every time false allegations reach critical mass?

The ball is in your court. How do you feel about what I’ve just written?

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When a Church Reconciles with a Former Pastor

Posted in Conflict with Church Antagonists, Conflict with Church Board, Conflict with the Pastor, Forgiveness and Reconciliation among Christians, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged forgiving a former pastor, reconciliation among Christian leaders, reconciliation with former pastors, restoring a former pastor on June 18, 2015| 5 Comments »

Many years ago, I became friends with a pastor in my denominational district who led a medium-sized church.

We had lunch together … saw each other at district meetings … and spent some time in conversation.

Then one day, my pastor friend … let’s call him Keith … was forced to resign after nearly a decade of ministry.

When I asked what happened, Keith told me that drugs were discovered inside his daughter’s suitcase at camp.

Even though she insisted that the drugs weren’t hers, a lynch mob from church formed, demanding that she repent in front of the congregation … and accusing her father of not managing his family well.

Choosing to believe his daughter, Keith resigned rather than subject her to public humiliation.

He was treated horribly, receiving only a small severance package and losing his medical insurance virtually overnight … ultimately a form of retribution.

After Keith quit, I invited him to lunch, and he poured out his heart to me. I was the only pastor in the district to hear his story.

Everybody else forsook him … and believed the story that was going around … that Keith’s daughter tried smuggling drugs to camp.

Only she didn’t.

Sometime later, a high school girl confessed to church leaders that the drugs were hers. Afraid that her suitcase would be searched, she placed the drugs in the suitcase of the pastor’s daughter … and sat silently by while the pastor’s family was run out of the church.

When anxiety grips a congregation … as it did in Keith’s case … some people become highly irrational, overreact emotionally, and seek to eliminate the cause of that anxiety: their pastor.

On a human scale, who usually keeps a congregation calm?

That’s right … the pastor.

But when the pastor is under attack, his own anxiety level skyrockets, and he’s in no position to calm anybody down.

This leaves two possibilities for alleviating congregational anxiety:

First, anxiety may be relieved if another leader … like the associate pastor, the board chairman, or a widely-respected individual … takes control of the situation and institutes a just and fair process to deal with people’s concerns about the pastor.

The problem is that most churches don’t have anybody like this … and even if they do, they don’t know how to do it.

*The associate pastor may be glad that the pastor is under attack, hoping to take his job.

*The board chairman may be leading the charge against the pastor.

*And those respected individuals may be ignored, avoided, or devalued by those who want to keep the anxiety level high. (Their adage is, “Never let a crisis go to waste.”)

Second, anxiety may be relieved if the pastor resigns.

And when anxiety hits a certain level in most churches, this is the quickest way to stabilize the congregation and lessen tensions.

But in the process, the pastor is judged as guilty … and never given the opportunity to tell his side of the story.

In Keith’s case, his reputation as a father … as well as his daughter’s reputation … were both smeared for months.

Fortunately, after matters calmed down, the church called a new pastor … someone I got to know a little bit.

And soon after he came, that new pastor discovered the truth about the drugs and Keith’s departure.

*Some pastors would have sided with Keith’s opponents just to gain their favor.

*Some pastors would have ignored the truth so they didn’t have to live in Keith’s shadow (small as it had become).

*Some pastors would have said, “Well, that’s water under the bridge … let’s move on.”

*Some pastors would have said, “Some people liked the pastor … some didn’t. I don’t want to take sides and alienate anyone.”

But the new pastor sought to pursue righteousness … even though it made some leaders/people in the church look bad.

The new pastor invited Keith and his family back to the church, where that pastor presided over a meeting where the congregation apologized to Keith and his family for the way they had wounded them.

For a while, I lost track of Keith … and then opened the major newspaper in our area one day and read a front-page article about him.

Keith had become a hospital chaplain and pioneered an approach to ministering to a certain class of patients with God’s mercy and grace … and was receiving nationwide attention for his efforts.

Could he have become that successful if his former church had not pursued reconciliation?

Because Keith’s former church was able to resolve their differences with him, they weren’t plagued by guilt and paralyzed by bitterness as happens in most churches.

That new pastor wisely understood that a congregation that has mistreated a pastor from the past cannot fully heal until there is an admission that the pastor was wronged and there is an attempt to reconcile with him.

After all, if God’s people can’t reconcile with a previous pastor, what hope do they have of reconciling a lost world to Jesus?

In their book Extreme Church Makeover, Neil Anderson and Charles Mylander tell the story of a pastor named John who discovered that “the church had not dealt fairly with their previous pastors …”

The authors write:

“John shared his observations with the current church board. Although the primary players were no longer in the church, the same pathology seemed to continue – which is almost always the case. Getting rid of a pastor or ungodly lay leaders doesn’t solve the problem by itself … it was obvious that past issues had only been covered up and not resolved.”

Pastor John “encouraged the board to contact Jerry, the previous pastor, and ask him if he would be willing to come back to the church for a special service of reconciliation. They discovered that Jerry was still hurting from the devastating experience and had not returned to the ministry.”

When Jerry stood before the church body, the board read a list of offenses the church had committed against him and asked for his forgiveness … and after he forgave them, Jerry later returned to the ministry.

I know many pastors who were abused and then forced out of their positions. These are good men who wish they could heal.

Some healing takes place when they unilaterally forgive their detractors … but complete reconciliation can only take place when a church and its leaders take responsibility for the way they treated their previous pastor … and let him know that they’re sorry for the way they mistreated him.

If you know of any churches that have pursued reconciliation with a previous pastor that underwent termination, I’d like to know about it. Please write me at jim@restoringkingdombuilders.org with the details.

But sadly, this kind of reconciliation happens all too rarely … probably less than 1% of the time.

Why do you think that is?

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High Noon at Your Church

Posted in Conflict with Church Antagonists, Conflict with the Pastor, Fighting Evil, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged attacking a pastor, challenging a pastor's leadership, church antagonists, Gary Cooper, High Noon, pastor-church conflict, pastoral termination on June 12, 2015| Leave a Comment »

Of the 450 or so blog posts that I’ve written, this is one of my favorites. It’s based on the film High Noon starring Gary Cooper and Grace Kelly and is considered to be one of the greatest films ever made. If you’ve never seen it, I encourage you to check it out … I saw it offered on Netflix the other night … and to ponder its relevance for the Christian church.

Toward the end of the last millennium, the American Film Institute produced a list of the Top 100 Films of All-Time. Since I was unfamiliar with most of them, I systematically visited the local video store and checked out as many as I could.

One of those films was High Noon – now listed by the Institute as the 27th greatest film ever.

Last night, through the magic of Roku, my wife and I watched the film again.

Gary Cooper stars as Marshal Will Kane. (My brother John has lived for years in Montana on land once owned by Gary Cooper.) As the film opens, it’s Kane’s wedding day. He’s marrying Amy (played by Grace Kelly).

But as they’re ready to leave on their honeymoon, Kane and his wife learn that the dreaded Frank Miller has been released from prison … and is coming to town on the noontime train … to wreak vengeance on the marshal who put him behind bars.

As evidence of this fact, Miller’s brother and two cohorts ride through the middle of town toward the train depot while all the townspeople scatter.

Marshal Kane is advised to hightail it out of town with his bride and not look back. After all, a new marshal is scheduled to take over the next day. Let him handle the Ferocious Four.

Kane is torn. On the one hand, everybody’s telling him to leave town with Amy … so that’s what he does. But five minutes outside town, he turns around and goes back, telling Amy that they’ll never be safe if he doesn’t confront Frank Miller and his boys now.

As I watched the film with fascination, I saw many parallels between the way people reacted to the conflict inside their town and the way churchgoers respond to open conflict at their church:

First, everyone feels anxious when a group’s leader experiences an attack.

The opening scenes of High Noon show a town that’s been rejuvenated. The people of the town are having fun and laughing.

But when Ben Miller (Frank’s younger brother) and his two buddies ride through town, everybody gets off the street and hides.

The town became a happy place because of the work done by Marshal Kane. He’s the one who cleaned up the streets and made the place safe for women and children.

But as anxiety rises in the town, people begin to engage in self-preservation.

When a group – and it’s always a group – attacks a pastor, the entire church senses something is wrong.

Sometimes people can tell a pastor is under attack because he’s no longer himself. He lowers his head, doesn’t smile, and seems jittery.

Other times, people start to hear rumors about the pastor – or charges by people who don’t like him.

And as anxiety begins to spread around the church, people start heading for the tall grass.

Second, a leader under attack needs reinforcements.

Marshal Kane was a tall, strong man who knew how to handle a gun. But would he prevail in a showdown with four experienced gunmen?

Probably not – so Kane began asking the townspeople for help. He asked men whom he had once deputized. He asked the guys in the local saloon. He even interrupted a church service and asked the congregation if a few men would volunteer to assist him.

After all, if 8 or 10 men stood shoulder-to-shoulder next to Kane, then maybe Frank Miller and his gang would see they were outnumbered and just ride out of town.

No pastor attacked by a group in a church can survive unless he has reinforcements.

Maybe some staff members are willing to stand with him … or the entire governing board … or some former leaders … or a group of longtime friends.

If the associate pastor stands with the pastor … along with the board chairman … and a few other key leaders, the pastor may have enough support to turn back the Gang of Gunmen.

But without that support, the pastor … and possibly the church … are toast.

Third, most people bail on their leader when he needs them the most.

This is the heart of the film.

Amy, the marshal’s new bride, runs away from her husband when they return to town because she’s a Quaker and doesn’t want to see any killing.

The guys in the saloon prove worthless.

The people in the church discuss helping their marshal … then decide against doing anything at all. (The pastor says he doesn’t know what to do.)

And Marshal Kane can’t convince any of his deputies to help him. One who said he’d stand by his leader runs when he discovers nobody else will help the marshal, and the current deputy is angry with Kane because he wasn’t selected to be marshal after Kane’s tenure.

Kane even goes to see a former girlfriend … and she announces she’s leaving town, too.

Over 25 years as a solo or senior pastor, there were attempts to get rid of me on three separate occasions.

The first two times, the board stood with me.

The last time, most of the staff and a group of current and former leaders stood with me.

But when most pastors are threatened, everybody bails on them.

Why is this?

Because people aren’t informed? Because it’s not their fight?

No, it’s usually because those who stand beside their pastor when he’s under attack end up enduring the same vilification that the pastor receives … and few are willing to suffer like that.

Finally, the only way to defeat the attackers is to stand strong.

After Frank Miller came in on the noon train, he and his boys left for town to carry out their plan: kill Marshal Kane.

At the same time, Kane’s former girlfriend climbed onto the train … along with his wife Amy.

When Amy hears shots, she instinctively bolts off the train and heads for town.

When she gets there, her husband has already killed two of the four gunmen.

While the drunks in the saloon nervously wait … and Kane’s friends hide in their homes … and the congregation down the road prays … Amy, of all people, defends her husband.

And in so doing, she saves his life … and their future together.

When a group attacks a pastor, they have one of two goals in mind: defeat him (by forcing him to leave) or destroy him (by ruining his reputation and damaging his career).

Because most pastors are tender souls, he usually has just two chances to emerge victorious after such a showdown: slim and none.

Even if the pastor wilts while attacked … and most do … the attackers can be driven away – and even eradicated – if the pastor has just a few Amys on his side.

While we have several incidents in the New Testament where a spiritual leader is corrected (Paul opposed Peter to his face in Galatians; Aquila and Priscilla instructed Apollos in Acts 18), we don’t have any incidents in the New Testament where a group of believers tries to destroy their spiritual leader.

So let’s do our best to eliminate this ecclesiastical plague in the 21st century.

With the Gang of Four lying motionless on the town’s streets, the townspeople come outside and cheer Amy and Marshal Kane … who drops his badge onto the street and leaves town for the final time.

Once upon a time, pastors would endure an attack in one church … then go to another church, where they’d be attacked again … then do the same thing several more times.

In our day, most pastors are leaving ministry after the first attack.

If High Noon ever comes to your church, don’t just talk or pray. If your pastor is being unfairly accused, be willing to fight with him.

Because if he leaves town, the Gang of Four will end up in charge.

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How Does a Pastor’s Family Heal After Termination?

Posted in Conflict with Church Antagonists, Conflict with the Pastor, Forgiveness and Reconciliation among Christians, Healing After Leaving a Church, Pastoral Termination, Please Comment!, tagged healing after pastoral termination, healing in the pastor's family, pastoral termination on June 9, 2015| 2 Comments »

On May 21, I wrote an article called Five Tough Questions about Pastoral Termination. In that blog post, I answered four questions that a forced-out pastor asked me several weeks ago.

But I didn’t answer this question:

What steps can the family take who has been affected by the trauma [of forced termination]? (My wife is having a hard time considering being back into a ministry position…she does not want to allow herself to be vulnerable again).

Why didn’t I answer this question?

Because the answer is complex and I needed time to think about my response.

If you’ve ever been fired from a job, then you know how humiliating the experience is … how difficult it is to explain to others … and how anxious you feel about finding a new job and being able to provide financially for your family.

But you still have your friends … your church family … your house … and your life.

However, when a pastor is forced out of office, his family usually loses nearly all their church friends … their church … sometimes their house (and credit rating) … and their life as they know it.

And the kicker is that all these losses are inflicted … often with malice and glee … by the hands of professing Christians.

So how does a pastor’s family heal after termination?

Let me offer seven brief ideas:

First, the pastor and his wife need to find several trusting friends they can confide in.

These friends need to be good listeners … empathetic … compassionate … wise … and very, very safe.

It doesn’t matter if they’re inside or outside the church. What matters most is that they’re trustworthy.

In my case, I confided in two former board chairmen, several pastoral colleagues, and a few other friends. To my knowledge, nobody turned on me.

My wife had several church friends that came and ministered to her … but she also confided in a few people who later turned on her … to the point that someone once told me, “So-and-So is not your friend.”

If the pastor and his wife discover that someone has definitely sold them out, the most prudent thing to do is to cut off all contact with them immediately… including Facebook and LinkedIn … and this is not an easy step to take. It feels so final.

Second, the pastor and his wife need to locate a Christian counselor who specializes in counseling Christian leaders.

Most major population centers have plenty of Christian counselors … licensed psychologists and psychiatrists whose primary focus is the local Christian world.

And within that counseling community are counselors who specialize in listening to and advising pastors, missionaries, the leaders of other Christian organizations … and their wives.

I was blessed to have a long-term personal and professional relationship with a counselor who was so valued that some Christian leaders flew into town just to see him.

Why see a counselor?

For three main reasons:

*To properly assess responsibility for your departure: how much was yours and how much was the church’s.

*To express your pain to someone who can interpret it and offer ideas for healing.

*To create a game plan for your future.

How do you find counselors with this kind of experience?

*Ask the pastors who live in your area.

*Ask other Christian counselors that you know.

*Call your Bible college/seminary and ask for referrals.

*Call several megachurches in your area and ask for referrals.

*Contact several counselors and see who can make room for you.

While our conflict was ongoing, my wife and I were extremely blessed to be referred to a Christian counselor in a nearby city. She had been a pastor’s wife for thirty years and understood both church conflict and spiritual warfare.

And when we moved to another state, we found another counselor who met with us both separately and together.

My research indicates that only twenty percent of all pastors who undergo forced termination seek a Christian counselor for healing. This means that four out of five pastors try to heal without the compassion and insights gleaned from someone who is trained to help hurting leaders.

How do you pay for this counseling?

In our case, we used our tithe. Since we no longer had a home church, we designated those funds for “kingdom ministry.”

Faced with the same set of circumstances, I’d do it again.

Third, speak appropriately with family members about your feelings.

Here’s what I mean by “appropriately”:

There are times when it’s fitting for a pastor, his wife, and their children to discuss how they feel about being forced to leave their church.

Such times differ from family to family.

For example, some children may need to discuss their father’s dismissal on a regular basis. They may need reassurance that God still loves them or that God will provide for their family financially.

But other children may not want to know anything about their dad’s departure. It’s too traumatic.

So rather than just launching into a tirade unannounced … and we’ve all been there … it might be wiser to ask your family, “I feel a need to discuss how I’m feeling right now. Is anyone open to hearing my feelings?”

If someone is, speak with them privately. If they’re not open, then don’t force them to listen.

Although it’s not easy to do, most emotional “dumping” should be done with a friend or a Christian counselor.

On the one hand, it’s toxic to a family’s well-being to discuss the termination all the time.

On the other hand, it’s dysfunctional not to acknowledge the pain involved on occasion.

The general rule of thumb is that the children heal before their parents … and that it can take a terminated pastor one to three years to heal.

I beg of the pastor’s family: give him plenty of room to be human … and don’t expect him to heal overnight.

The older he is, and the longer he was in a church, the more time he’ll need to heal.

Fourth, take some trips/vacations as soon as possible.

After the trauma of termination, a pastor’s family needs to have some fun.

If they don’t have much money, they might take a few weekends off … stay with family or friends in other locales … go camping together … or enjoy a staycation at home.

If they do have some money saved … or if the pastor received a good separation package … then the pastor’s family should take a week and go somewhere that will lift everyone’s spirits.

The time away will help the pastor and his family to feel safe … to regain perspective … and to reconnect with family.

In our case, my wife visited family in Texas, and then we went to the East Coast for a vacation. (Someone gave us their time share in Virginia.)

You might not have this time again for a while … so take advantage of it.

Make some good memories.

Fifth, the pastor and his wife can benefit from a Wellness Retreat.

About a month after we left our last church, we flew to Tennessee for a five-day, four-night Wellness Retreat sponsored by a Christian organization that specializes in helping pastors who have experienced forced termination.

The retreat was a place to make new friends … tell our individual stories … express our pain … receive encouragement and guidance … and leave feeling inspired.

As I recall, there were about twelve of us attending the retreat, and my wife and I thoroughly enjoyed our time there.

We learned why forced terminations occur in general … received insights into our own situations … and had plenty of time to ask questions and trade ideas.

The retreat is offered on a scholarship basis. The only cost to the pastoral couple is transportation.

I highly recommend this retreat. If you’d like to receive more information, please email me at jim@restoringkingdombuilders.org and I’ll be glad to put you in touch with the retreat’s organizer.

Sixth, consider attending church somewhere but avoid getting involved until you’re nearly healed.

Every pastoral couple has several options when it comes to church attendance after a termination:

*Avoid church altogether. There were Sundays when we didn’t have the strength to get up and go to church (giving us insight as to why some Christians in our ministries missed church!), but we went most of the time. But when we didn’t go, we didn’t feel guilty and viewed it as part of the healing process.

*Visit many kinds of churches. This might be a good time to visit churches that you wouldn’t normally visit: mainline churches … charismatic churches … new church starts … smaller churches in your community … and churches where you know the pastor.

*Visit churches so you can find a church home. In our case, it took six months to find a church home … and we ended up returning to a church we had already rejected and loving it.

*Visit a megachurch and just veg. Find a good church nearby and just take it all in. Sit in the back row. Come a little late. Leave when the service closes. Get involved if you want to but don’t feel like you have to serve every Sunday.

*Find a church where you can serve. During the first year, you’re still wounded … and tender … and emotional. If you try and serve as a volunteer too soon, all those negative feelings may come pouring back into your mind and spirit whenever something goes wrong.

My wife and I have learned to avoid (a) new church plants; (b) churches that meet in schools; and (c) small churches. The larger the church, the better … at least for the first year … and maybe longer.

Finally, unilaterally forgive those who have hurt you without expecting reconciliation.

One year after a pastor and his wife leave a church, my guess is that those who “got rid of the pastor” feel exactly the same way. They haven’t “seen the light” … haven’t repented of any wrongdoing … and have only hardened their position.

So reconciliation … enemies becoming friends once again … is almost impossible for you to achieve.

Since you can’t meet with those who hurt you … to hear their side, to ask forgiveness, and to express your pain to them … the best you can do is to forgive your detractors unilaterally.

This transaction happens between you and God. You either:

*ask God to forgive them, or

*tell God that you have forgiven them.

Ask God when and how you should do it … but realize that your healing will be delayed until you take this step.

_______________

It’s been five-and-a-half years since my wife and I left our last church. In my case:

*I think about our former ministry nearly every day.

*My wife and I still talk about that church from time-to-time.

*I know I will never be a pastor again.

*I still miss certain friends from that church.

*I am grateful for all that God did through us during the ten-and-a-half years we were there.

*I believe that God’s timing in rushing us out of the church was perfect … I just didn’t like His methodology.

I have accepted the fact that I will always be wounded … but that doesn’t mean that I’m bitter.

You may be wounded for the rest of your days as well, but so was Moses … so was Jesus … and so was Paul … and they were all used by God in a greater way because of their wounds.

I recall a quote from A.W. Tozer that went something like this: “God only greatly uses those whom He has crushed.”

If you’ve been crushed as I have, it’s entirely possible that your best ministry isn’t the last one you left … it’s the next one that God has in store for you.

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Restoring Kingdom Builders

Archive for the ‘Pastoral Termination’ Category

When You Hear Rumors About Your Pastor

Six Reasons Why God Allows Pastors to be Terminated

Preaching and Pastoral Termination

What’s the Real Story Behind Pastoral Terminations?

When Should the Pastor of a Church in Steady Decline Leave?

The Associate Pastor – Church Board Conspiracy

How Does a Pastor Respond to False Allegations?

When a Church Reconciles with a Former Pastor

High Noon at Your Church

How Does a Pastor’s Family Heal After Termination?

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