I’m currently reading a book by Kent Crockett called Pastor Abusers: When Sheep Attack Their Shepherd. Crockett is currently on the staff of a church in Alabama.
In his first chapter, titled “The Secret Church Scandal,” the author writes:
“The secret church scandal we’re talking about is the persecution of the pastor by mean-spirited people within the church, who are the ‘pastor abusers.’ They’re planted in nearly every congregation. Many are even running the church. They may be deacons, disloyal staff members, or members of the congregation who are determined to destroy the pastor through personal attacks, slander, and criticism. Outwardly they may look respectable, but inwardly their hearts are wicked, and their mission is to bring down their spiritual leader.”
I must confess, I cannot understand why professing Christians would ever do such a thing.
Based on my own experience, I can understand why believers might:
*disagree with their pastor’s teaching.
*find him to be arrogant or obnoxious.
*become bored with his preaching or stories.
*choose to leave their church for another.
But how can a believer who has the Holy Spirit living inside of him or her ever try and destroy or bring down a pastor called by God?
Crockett continues:
“Pastor abuse is the scandal that no one is talking about. The mistreatment of clergy is as horrifying as it is secretive, and the casualties are reaching epidemic proportions. Over 19,000 pastors get out of the ministry every year. When the sermon ends on Sunday, over 350 pastors will be gone before the next Sunday service begins.”
These statements are similar to ones that I made in my recent book Church Coup … and no, I did not consult Crockett’s book before I wrote mine. But it’s amazing how many nearly-identical statements we both made.
What happens after a pastor under fire leaves? Crockett continues:
“Meanwhile, the revolving door at the church makes another turn. As the fired pastor makes his exit, the old guard looks to find another pastor who will meet all of their expectations, and history repeats itself with a new victim. Just like the abusive husband beats his next wife, the abusive church will mistreat its next pastor.”
How can a church prevent this revolving door syndrome? Both Crockett and I agree that the perpetrators must be given a choice: repent of your sinful actions or leave the fellowship. Yet Crockett writes:
“Because few churches exercise church discipline, pastor abusers are rarely held accountable for their actions. This emboldens them to keep attacking God’s shepherds, knowing that no one will challenge their despicable behavior. Eventually someone must take a stand against the abusers and hold them accountable, or their attacks will never end. Church discipline is essential is we’re ever going to solve the pastor abuser problem.”
There are times when I feel like I’m talking to myself about this issue, but as soon as I get together with other believers – whether they’re family members or old friends – they’ll immediately start telling me about a conflict that devastated their church years ago, or one they’re going through right now, or one they sense is coming.
Then they’ll tell me about a pastor or staff member who left church ministry … and about family members who have quit going to church altogether … and sometimes they’ll admit that they’ve quit going to church as well.
How can Christians remain silent about this issue?
If we want Christ’s kingdom to expand … if we want our churches to grow … if we believe that Christians should attend and stay in local congregations … then shouldn’t we do all we can to prevent pastors and Christians from leaving the church altogether?
I’m willing to speak up … how about you?
I’ll write more about Kent Crockett’s book Pastor Abusers next time.
Check out our website at www.restoringkingdombuilders.org You’ll find Jim’s story, recommended resources on conflict, and a forum where you can ask questions about conflict situations in your church.
Restoring Kingdom Builders 
Thanks Jim, for another good article. I received your book a few weeks ago and your personal note in it, I felt encouraged.
I am now serving in another church, but not as a pastor anymore. Perhaps in the future again.
In September 2013 I will start my theological study for my bachelors. During the day I am working full-time in sales.
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Peter, thanks so much for the update! The Lord needs leaders like you, so hang in there. You’re young enough to learn from what happened and get back into church ministry. What are you selling?
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Jim,
Thanks for the encouragement. I am a sales rep for a laboratory company called Greiner Bio-One. They manufacture vacuum blood tubes, etc. A direct competitor of BD with their Vacutainer tubes. A very specialized market!
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Sounds interesting, Peter! I’m always wondering if there is life after church ministry, and I guess there is. God bless you!
Jim
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Anyone who loves God and loves people would never
do such a thing. I think we are admonished by God in
His word to love and respect the pastor. I have no
doubt that the pastor(s) in question have been treated
unfairly by members of the church. But would you care to
see if from the other side, which happens just as often
if not more so. I’ve seen where the pastor IS the abuser
and where those on the board of directors of the church
will stand by him even when he has a pattern of abuse
towards certain church members. I know someone who
asked to meet with the pastor after he reprimanded her
from the pulpit on a Sunday morning service deliberately
trying to humiliate her. I saw it with my own eyes. I knew
the accusation was untrue. Yet when she tried to meet with
him, (which was the biblical way in the first place) his
only reply was he didn’t have time and to “touch not
God’s anointed”. He never contacted her about it again.
When he felt he had no choice he sent his wife to talk to
her, I guess to make the problem “go away”. His wife
refused to listen to her and made it sound like her husband
could do no wrong and if the word was not true, then she
should not be bothered by it. I have seen so many things
like this happening it’s disturbing. Please remember,
abuse can happen from either side. It’s a problem and
it must be addressed!!! But please don’t be so one-sided
about it. Abuse is more likely to happen coming from
someone with a title or position attached to their name.
It’s wrong either way!!!
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Dear Friend,
I agree with you that abuse is wrong, whether it originates from a pastor toward a church member or whether it’s directed toward the pastor. Sadly there are some pastors in local churches that do abuse other people. When they do, the official church board should insist that the pastor apologize and make things right or the board should take steps to remove the pastor from office.
Please check out the last article I wrote on my blog. It’s about when the pastor uses the phrase, “Touch not the Lord’s anointed.” That biblical phrase should never be used by a pastor as “magic words” to keep people from correcting him when he’s out of line. I have written many articles about pastors who violate the standard of love. Check out my articles on Stupid Pastors … Narcissistic Pastors … and Control Freak Pastors as examples.
Whenever a pastor is forced out of a church, 45% of the time it’s due to a faction in the church, and 7% of the time it’s due to the pastor’s misconduct. So it’s 6 1/2 times more likely that a pastor will be abused by church people than a pastor will abuse someone else. But there ARE pastors who abuse people, and that behavior should never be tolerated.
Thank you for writing. May God bless you and your church abundantly in the days ahead.
Jim
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Thank you for your reply to my comment. Just the fact that
you did reply and didn’t brush me off is refreshing. I will read
your previous articles concerning abuse in the church,
whether it’s towards a pastor or coming from a pastor.
I hate abuse because I know God hates it even more.
God bless you and your ministry always!!
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I hear a lot of stories about people who abuse pastors, and I’ve experienced it myself over 36 years of church ministry. My friend Kent Crockett wrote a great book called Pastor Abusers and it’s a real eye-opener. But pastors can be guilty of abuse as well … especially verbal abuse from the pulpit. There’s an article I wrote a few months after I first started writing my blog asking whether pastors should preach at people from the pulpit. It’s a real temptation for pastors, but one they should never engage in. A sermon should be for everybody and should never be directed specifically at certain individuals. However, there are always people who will hear a pastor’s words and conclude that he was trying to “preach at them,” especially when the church is undergoing conflict.
Feel free to write anytime. I do my best to answer everyone’s comments in a timely way.
Jim
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All abuse is SIN. Leaders of churches can and should hold pastor’s accountable for their words and actions. As a pastor who experienced such abuse in a congregation in Florida, there is little or no interest in holding abusive congregational leaders and members to accountability in regards to their treatment of pastors. Higher judicatories will almost always refuse to deal with abusive behavior. Their hope is for the pastor to move on. After all, they will always have to live with the churches in their region, soooo, judicatories are often complicit adding to the pain of the pastor and his/her family.
Pastor Rob Swinsburg
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Rob, having experienced abuse myself, I resonate with your words. Thanks for your comment!
Jim
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